Holidaze
by sonomom
Summary: Sometimes when you look back on your life it's the holidays that stand out in memories. When Stephanie looks back on her life she will remember the holidays of one particular year. The year that changed everything. Babe. HEA-eventually.
1. Chapter 1

_I own nothing except my mistakes, but thanks to jago-ji, I shouldn't have too many of those!_

 **Give Me A Ring Sometime**

"Not a distraction, Babe. Insurance. I need you for insurance."

"I don't get it, Ranger. You're entirely capable of doing this on your own."

"It's Valentine's Day. I'll be conspicuous if I enter the bar alone. I need a date."

"Yeah, well I'm betting you can find someone to hang onto your arm for one evening."

"Babe, please."

Damn. He wasn't playing fair. I always melted when he said please, and this time was no exception, but I didn't have to be gracious in my defeat. "Okay, but I want a meal out of this deal. If I'm giving up my Valentine's Day to work, I want a decent meal. Italian. With dessert."

"My pleasure," he said with a not too veiled hint of sarcasm. "I'll pick you up at seven."

"No, I have something else planned for earlier in the evening," I said. "I'll meet you at the bar, but I can't be there till eight."

"That will make dinner late," he said.

"I'm a big girl. I don't have a curfew."

There was just a moment's hesitation before he agreed and disconnected. I smiled. I knew he was wondering, despite his best intention, if I was seeing someone. I wasn't and I wouldn't lie about it if I was asked, but it wouldn't hurt him to consider that I might be.

Joe and I were history, but we were still friendly. I waited for a month or so after we broke up, but Ranger never made a move—well, except for the kind of moves he always made. Gradually, I realized there would be no big shift between Ranger and me, and I accepted the status quo, mostly. Ranger and I had an understanding. We both wanted one another, and we both knew it. Some deep-seated sense of self-preservation kept me from making things too easy for him.

Ranger was a stealth bomber. He swooped down in the dark of night, undetectable by sight or sound, and unstoppable by my apartment security. He struck without warning and left me a hollowed out, languorous, smoldering victim so satiated I was unable to protest his less stealthy leaving. This was not a good foundation for a relationship. He had no intent of permanence, and he made no pretense that he did.

So I played little games. I didn't always make myself available, and I didn't completely bend to his wishes. Telling him I had plans earlier in the evening was one of those games. It wasn't that I wanted to be dishonest, but I needed to take a measure of control when I could. And it didn't hurt if it made him take a moment to realize I had areas in my life in which he had no part. It went a small way toward keeping the balance between us.

I thought it was odd that he needed a date. He'd said he needed insurance, but I couldn't imagine against what. I sensed there was more to his request for a _date_ than I knew, but I'd have to wait until I saw him to get the rest of the story. This was not a distraction. I had plenty of distraction clothes I could choose from, but I thought this called for something a little more upscale. I needed an outfit that was discreetly sexy. I went shopping in my closet.

The Radius Bar had made the top ten list of New Jersey's most romantic spots, and judging from the wait for valet parking, it looked like Valentine's Day was going to be very profitable for the establishment. It was just a minute after eight when I made my way inside. I looked around for a moment letting my gaze linger on a couple standing in a close embrace. The woman's face was half turned to allow her date access to her neck. Part of me wanted to call out, "Get a room," but part of me felt a little envious.

While my attention was distracted, Ranger materialized beside me. A quick indrawn breath indicated my surprise as his hand moved to the small of my back. As he guided me through the crowded foyer, I was waiting for him to remind me to be aware of my surroundings, but he was silent as he moved me forward into the bar proper. There were no empty seats, but Ranger steered me toward the far end of the bar where, magically, as we approached, two men stood and vacated their stools. Yep, there was more going on here than met the eye. I turned to Ranger intending to ask for the rest of the story. His hand wrapped around my elbow, and he steadied me as I slipped up onto the still warm stool.

For the first time that night I took a good long look at him, and an electric tingle shot through me. You think I'd get used to his physical magnificence, but I don't. This night, he was wearing all black, as usual, but a designer cut was evident. He'd come a long way from the man who'd agreed to be my mentor. I took a quick look down at myself. I was also in black, the simplicity of the dress an indication of the spike it had made on my credit card balance. If I thought he'd changed from the man I'd met those years ago, then the same was true about me. I'd come a long way from the inexperienced bounty-hunter-wannabe that had shared a lunch with him at a downtown Trenton café.

We'd both grown, not together exactly, but not apart either. Ranger was part of my life as I was part of his; the problem was we had different ideas of how we fit into one another's lives. If we were both pieces of a puzzle, he'd be that one final piece that snaps in place and makes everything complete. I was afraid I was just a border piece in his puzzle—a necessary, but somewhat interchangeable piece.

Ranger took his place on my left, at the very end of the bar. He turned to face me and bent to whisper in my ear. He gave the impression of an attentive lover, but I wasn't fooled. From his slightly turned position he could see the entire bar area, and his whispered words in my ear left no doubt that this was work, not social. "What can I get you to drink? It needs to be something weak as we may be here for a while. I know your intolerance for alcohol, and it wouldn't be good if you slid off the stool before my mission was complete."

Mission? Intolerance for alcohol? Asshole. I turned to the bartender who was respectfully hovering a few feet away. My lips curved in what I thought of as my best compliant girlfriend smile and said, "I'll take a Jameson, neat." I knew from long years of experience how Joe would have reacted to my insubordination. I gave Ranger a sideways glance, but instead of seeing displeasure on his face I saw humor. Obviously, I hadn't pushed the button I'd intended. His mouth twitched at the edges and then gave up the fight and erupted into a full-on smile.

"You never disappoint, Stephanie." He let his attention slide from me to the bartender. "I'll take the water back," he said.

"What's going on here?" I asked. "I know you said you needed insurance. But against what?" Ranger was silent until the bartender placed my drink in front of me and a half-filled highball glass in front of Ranger. It was clear, so I assumed he'd actually gotten water.

"I've been asked by a very important person to be present in this bar tonight."

"Well, that sounds mysterious," I said. "I want the full story, especially if I'm part of it." I took a large gulp of whiskey and struggled to get it down without sputtering it all over the bar. The burn down my throat gave way to a burn in my belly and after a few seconds, I realized it was a nice burn. I picked up the glass again, only to have Ranger take it from me and set it back down on the bar.

"Slowly, please," he said. There was that damn word again. "You remember the Ramos family, I'm certain."

" _Yesss_ ," I said. I did remember the Ramos family and how much trouble they'd caused for Ranger. The family headed a well-known local crime syndicate. When Ranger had started RangeMan he'd used an obscure connection he had with the Ramos' to enhance his street credentials. They had double or maybe triple-crossed him, but he'd come out on top.

"Are you messing with the Ramos family again?" I asked. "I thought you'd be beyond needing their help by this time."

"You can never have too many friends in low places, Babe. The Ramos family is not what it used to be. After Alexander died, they brought in a cousin from Mykonos to run the family business."

"Oh great, a new Ramos."

"He's not new. Nikomedes Mattas has been in Trenton for several years."

I gasped when I heard the name. "Niko Mattas is part of the Ramos family?" I asked.

Ranger lifted one eyebrow. "You're familiar with Niko?" he asked.

"I … well … no." I was stammering and I knew I had to regain some composure. Ranger had the ability to read my thoughts, and I didn't want him reading anything into what I knew about Niko Mattas.

What I'd said was true enough. I wasn't familiar with Niko. I didn't even really know him, but I'd almost known him. I mean _really known_ him. I picked up my glass to take a drink and then had a second thought. I'd been drinking Jameson that night, too. I let my eyes drift back to Ranger and noted the intensity of his stare.

"Did you sleep with him?" Ranger asked quietly. Maybe too quietly.

"No!" I responded. This time I did take a drink. "I just met him once. It was the night after I'd brought in Danny Zerbo. I collected five grand on him and Lula, Connie and I went out to celebrate." I stiffened on my barstool as I remembered that we'd come to Radius that night. It was the only other time I'd been to the bar.

Niko had introduced himself to me and insisted on buying a round of drinks for the three of us. He'd joined us at the table then, and in the way things sometimes happen, both Lula and Connie had found other entertainments, so Niko and I had been left alone. He was charming with a dazzling white smile that was almost equal to Ranger's in its wattage. And he was a lot freer with his smile than Ranger had ever thought of being. I remembered it had just been a couple of weeks since Joe and I had called it quits. Ranger had been MIA and I was feeling low.

Niko was forthright about what he wanted. He promised a night of passion, and he looked like he could deliver on his promise. I considered his offer very seriously. But then that stupid Burg good-girl, Catholic guilt thing had erupted and I'd declined. He'd accepted my refusal in a calm gentlemanly way and slipped his business card inside my bag. He'd stood from the table, kissed my hand and left me with a nice memory of his dimpled smile. "Call me, Stephanie, when you change your mind."

I'd never called, but I'd considered it several times in the weeks after that night. I remembered his card had indicated he owned an import/export company. I groaned. He was a member of the Ramos family, and I now had a good idea of what he was importing and exporting.

"Um, Ranger," I said. "Is it going to jeopardize what's happening tonight if he recognizes me?" I asked. I wasn't even sure if he would recognize me. After all, it was only one brief interlude in a dark bar, but I thought I'd better let Ranger know it was a possibility.

"No. I'm doing a favor for him. He won't be present tonight, but if I'm successful in accomplishing what he's asked me to do he'll owe me one, and that's a nice position to be in." Ranger was looking at me with that quiet speculation that gave me a small spurt of satisfaction. This afternoon, when I'd told him I had plans for earlier in the evening, I'd purposefully tried to pique his interest. Now I had inadvertently done an even better job of showing Ranger he didn't know all my secrets. I smiled sweetly at him and picked up my drink, this time taking a small sip.

"What are you doing in the bar that is so important to Niko?" I asked. Before he could answer my question I was shoved sideways, almost off my stool and almost into Ranger's lap. Ranger merely raised an eyebrow, but hadn't pulled a gun or knife so I turned to see what had caused my near tumble off the barstool. It was half of the canoodling couple I'd seen in the bar foyer. She was a young fresh-faced girl and she was looking concernedly in my direction.

"Ohmygosh!" she exclaimed. "I'm sorry."

"That's okay," I told her as I re-centered myself on my own seat.

"It's these heels," she said laughing. "I tripped as I was trying to sit down in a hurry. I made a dash for it when I saw these seats come open." She twisted on the stool and flexed her foot so I could see the cause of her disequilibrium.

"Very nice," I said. The heels in question were strappy and very high. And maybe my neighbor was a little high, too.

"This is a great place, don't you think?"

"Yes," I said. "It is nice." I looked at Ranger to see if this chatty girl was going to interfere with our reason for being here … whatever that was. He seemed unconcerned.

"My boyfriend, Timmy, is in the men's room, so I'm saving a seat for him." She tilted her head to the empty barstool next to her, and I looked around her to see she had a small evening bag saving his spot. She leaned close to me. "I was worried we wouldn't find a place to sit. It's crazy in here tonight. So many people celebrating Valentine's Day." She took the opportunity to look over my shoulder, and I saw her eyes widen in appreciation as she saw Ranger. She smiled and, at first I thought she was smiling at Ranger, until she gave a little finger wave and I realized she was looking beyond Ranger. "Here comes my boyfriend," she said. "I overheard him talking to one of his buddies on the phone when we were waiting for a seat, and I think he's going to propose to me tonight! Isn't that romantic?"

"I—yes, it is," I agreed. I took another drink. If this chatterbox was going to sit next to me all night I might have to ask for combat pay, if I was even being paid at all. Ranger had said he needed a date, and I didn't think he usually had to pay for his dates. Maybe my pay was going to be the Italian dinner he'd promised. I looked over at him to see his eyes focused on some scenario across the room.

"Hi, Timmy baby," I heard my neighbor say as she swiveled her chair and focused her attention on the young man and presumable future fiancé who now sat on the barstool next to her.

I took another sip and glanced at Ranger who was still intent on something or someone across the room. Ranger was never talkative and tonight was no exception, so I contented myself to wait until he was ready to tell me what was going on. I knew he'd fill me in eventually. I took a small sip of the Jameson and looked around the bar.

It deserved its reputation as a romantic spot. There was a tuxedoed man at a grand piano playing up tempo, smooth jazz. The music provided a muted background that allowed intimate conversation to flourish. The bar was semi-circular with the rest of the seating fanning out around it. There were tables between the bar and a ring of secluded booths that rimmed the periphery.

The booths were lit with soft candlelight and had low banquette seating. I thought it would be nice to be snuggled up next to Ranger on the luxuriously padded bench, sipping wine, sharing quiet conversation and an occasional kiss. Our hands would be linked under the table and there would be the promise of what was to come reflected in both our eyes. I sighed. No matter what he said, this wasn't a date. This was work, because he was sitting in the place best suited to surveil the entire bar. I was getting the impression I was just window dressing, a warm body to fill the seat beside him.

The little hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. I straightened my spine and tried to be casual as I leaned into Ranger. "Is it happening?" I asked.

"No."

"I feel like it's happening," I said. "Something isn't right here." I watched Ranger as his eyes roamed the room. There was no change in his expression, and he gave no indication anything was wrong, but there was an instant when his eyes widened almost imperceptibly. Almost.

I picked up my tumbler and took another sip using the opportunity to look in the direction Ranger had been looking. She was tiny, impeccably groomed, and classically beautiful—and she was staring at me. I thought she would have been stunning if it wasn't for the contorted expression and the laser-like gaze of pure hatred that was centered entirely on me.

My eyes swiveled to Ranger and I leaned in close. "Are you sure it's not happening. There's a woman over there who is staring at me like she wants me dead." Ranger leaned in and whispered in my ear. I knew it looked to the rest of the bar as though we were completely involved in whispering love talk to one another. But Ranger was not completely involved. His eyes still scanned the bar and what he said was far from seductive.

"She's the reason I needed insurance." At his words I leaned in even closer. I could have let my lips and tongue skim the sensitive cords at the base of his neck or I could have sunk my teeth into his jugular like Vampira, and depending on what he said next I'd make my decision.

He stiffened, slightly. No one but me noticed, but I was invading his personal space like crazy in an attempt to find out what the heck I was doing here. "Your instincts are good, Babe. It is happening now."

"Okay, that's it!" I said quietly. "What the hell is going on, Ranger?"

There was a sigh, a big one. His body language was that of a lover. He leaned in and caressed my hair, and I fought the temper-induced urge to jerk back. He may have given the appearance of a lover, but he was a man at work. I knew Ranger well enough to know his attention was not fully on me.

"I'm here because I am the only one in Trenton who can identify an arms dealer known as La Muerte Blanca," he whispered into my ear. His breath on my neck caused a ripple of unwanted desire to wash through me. Damn the man. I smooshed my thighs together, ignored the tingle and made myself concentrate on what Ranger was saying. "His real name is Eduardo Vera, and Niko needs to know if he makes an appearance in this bar tonight."

"Okay," I said. I let a finger trail up his sleeve and then turned away to take another drink of the Jameson. I thought I was going to need the courage for the rest of the story, and I was right.

"I spent time in a Colombian prison," Ranger said flatly. "Eduardo Vera is known mostly by reputation. Not many people can recognize him by sight, but I will never forget his face."

"Was he in prison with you?" I asked.

"It was his prison, Babe." I looked up at something I heard in his voice, and I drew back a little. Now, there were two people in this bar that had the look of someone who wanted to kill in their eyes.

"If Vera is in Trenton, it's to make a deal that will be detrimental to Niko. I'm here to put eyes on the players and tell Niko if his Intel was right."

"That's very interesting," I said. "What am I doing here?" I had a horrible suspicion that I knew exactly what my role was.

"You are here as my guest, but we don't have to stay much longer. La Muerte Blanca has left the building," Ranger said. "He just made his contact and walked out the door. I need to call Niko and tell him his information was correct, and then we can leave."

"I don't think so," I said. "Tell me about the woman who wants to kill me. Is it because I'm sitting next to you?"

"Babe."

"Ranger." There was another sigh and I sensed rather that saw some of the tenseness go out of him. He thought his night's work was done. I knew it wasn't. He was going to have to tell me just why he'd needed insurance.

"Elaina Mattas owns this bar. She is Niko's sister, and yes, I wanted you to be here so she wouldn't approach me."

"Did you sleep with her?" I asked, repeating the question he'd asked when I told him I knew Niko.

"Yes." And then after the briefest hesitation, "It was a mistake."

My thighs smooshed even tighter, and I resisted the urge to put a hand to my midsection to contain the sudden roiling of my stomach. I knew Ranger had other women. We weren't in an exclusive relationship. Okay, we weren't really in a relationship … our ships mainly just passed in the night. But this was the first of Ranger's other women I'd ever seen, at least knowingly. And judging from the look on her face, Elaina might have been having the same experience as me.

"It was a time ago, and I was clear in my intent. I thought we were on the same page," Ranger said, "but we weren't. She wanted more than I was willing to give. She's unstable. Normally, I just avoid this place, and Niko is aware of that, but the Intel was firm and I was the only one who could identify Vera, so here I am—and here you are. But my work is done and we can go."

"I'm not ready to leave yet," I said, giving evidence I was not thinking clearly. The woman was still staring daggers at me. She was another piece to the puzzle that was Ranger, and it looked like she'd just figured out she was a border piece, too. Anyone in their right mind would be getting the heck out of Dodge, but I decided I needed another drink. I raised my hand slightly to flag down the very busy bartender.

The bartender was working his way down to me. I thought the bar was understaffed for Valentine's Day and maybe Elaina should quit giving me the death stare and start working behind the bar.

"Another Jameson, water back, ma'am?" the bartender asked, his gaze encompassing both Ranger and me. I nodded.

Working behind the bar on a busy night looked like hard work. As he turned to grab the bottle of Jameson, my next door neighbor said, "Hey, I'll have one of those, too. Whatever she's drinking, I mean." It was followed by a long throaty giggle that made me think my earlier assessment was correct. I didn't think this was her first barstool of the night.

I turned to take a closer look at her, and I saw the bartender pause and make eye contact with her date, Timmy baby. After a nod from Timmy the bartender pulled another tumbler off the shelf. Timmy had to give permission for his date to drink. I didn't have that problem, probably because I didn't have a date. I wasn't sure what Ranger was, my employer maybe, if he was intending to pay me for the evening … misdirected if he wasn't. I wasn't sure why I wanted to stay, but I was not going without more detail about Elaina.

And it looked like I was about to get my chance. While I'd been watching the interchange between the bartender and the couple next to me, Elaina had made her move. She was standing behind the bar leaning over just enough to show Ranger her attributes. Yes, I needed to stay for another drink.

"Hello, Carlos. It's been awhile."

"Elaina."

"Introduce me to your friend, Carlos."

Ranger didn't reply so I stuck out my hand. "Stephanie Plum," I said. She stared at me for a long time and then turned and walked out from behind the bar, back to the corner where she'd been earlier. "Well," I said. "That was a little odd."

"She is odd," Ranger agreed. "I needed someone by my side tonight that I could trust. Thank you for coming."

Suddenly my desire to stay at the bar was gone. Ranger's words caused my burgeoning anger to subside. He trusted me. Yes, he had other women, but I had other men. That is, I used to have Joe, so it was only right that Ranger would have involvements with other women, but I was the one he trusted. I couldn't help myself. I was flattered and maybe more than flattered. I was starting to hope that I was more than a border puzzle piece. A corner piece, or … my thoughts were interrupted as I realized the drink I'd ordered was in front of me.

I turned to see that Ranger had a fresh glass of water in front of him. "Let's go," I told him. "I've changed my mind about staying."

Ranger picked up his water and took a drink. "Might as well finish your drink," he said. "I'll call Ella and tell her we'll be there in a half-hour. That will give her time."

"Ella? I thought you were going to take me out for an Italian dinner."

"I'm not taking you out. I'm taking you in, and you'll have a superb meal complete with tiramisu, as promised."

"You're taking me to your apartment for dinner?" I asked. The thought secretly thrilled me, but I was trying not to let him see it.

He leaned in, his lips brushing my ear. "I thought we should start our Valentine's celebration close to the place we want the night to end."

Heat was racing southward with every irregular beat of my heart. Damn the man. I groaned and he smiled. "Drink up, Babe." He motioned to the glass in front of me and pulled out his phone to call Ella.

I raised the glass to my lips and prepared to take a large gulp. I wanted the glass empty ASAP. Something caught my eye, though, and I quickly set the glass back on the bar. I stuck my index finger into the glass, hooked the object off the bottom and then swiveled back to face Ranger. I was holding a large diamond engagement ring in front of his face. Neither of us moved as we watched an amber drop of Jameson's gather and fall from the ring. For once, Ranger's expression was not blank. The surprise was evident from the lift of his brows to the slight parting of his lips. Before I could question him there was a shout from behind me.

I turned to see my garrulous bar mate with her hands around her throat. I thought she was choking until I heard the wheeze of an indrawn breath. Her eyes rolled back and she toppled off the barstool, landing with a soft thud on the floor, despite Timmy's attempt to catch her.

"What…" I started, only to be interrupted by Timmy's cry.

"She's dead!" he screamed and fell to his knees beside the unmoving form of his date.

Ranger thrust his phone into my hands and moved to push Timmy out of the way. His hand went to the base of her neck, and I realized he was checking for a pulse.

"Call 911," he said tersely. His eyes met mine and there was something there, but I couldn't read it. It was a message I was sorry I was missing. "Tell them poison, Babe." He turned to Timmy. "She's not dead. Help is on the way." And then he stood and looked behind the bar for a moment. He ran the short distance to the end of the bar, rounded the corner and disappeared in the same direction I'd seen Elaina go just a few minutes before.

I called 911 and told them we thought the girl had been poisoned. I stayed on the line as they requested, but I couldn't give them any more useful information. I watched in horror as Timmy and a waiter tried to give the girl first aid, and was a little relieved when someone proclaiming themselves to be a nurse moved through the crowded onlookers to help.

It was probably only minutes before the first responders arrived, but it seemed like hours. When a paramedic knelt beside the now unconscious girl, Timmy looked up to tell him what had happened. "This is my fault," he said. "I had the bartender put her engagement ring in the drink. It was a surprise, but she choked on it. I've killed her."

Realization hit me with such force that I fell back against the bar. I looked down and saw the ring still sitting on the damp cocktail napkin where I'd dropped it. I'd gotten her drink … and she'd gotten mine. Elaina's death stare had been just that. She'd tried to kill me.

"No," I said. "She didn't swallow the ring. Here it is." I handed it to Timmy and then sank back down on my stool as the two paramedics prepared her for transport. "I think she was poisoned," I told them.

As the paramedics left, two Trenton police officers came in. There were several minutes of confusion. The piano player had stopped, but the bar was far from silent. One of the officer's voices boomed over the bar's PA system. We were all being detained for questioning. I sat back on my barstool and wrapped my hands around my glass. I lifted it, two-handed, from the bar and then thought better about taking a drink. My hand went to my throat as I remembered the girl clutching hers. I set the drink back on the counter and stood as I saw Ranger reenter the bar from a door in the far corner, Elaina's escape route.

He came to my side. "Are you okay?" he asked.

"Ranger, what the hell is going on?"

"In a minute, Babe." He moved quickly toward the front of the bar where the police were trying to organize patrons into groups for questioning. My heart dropped as I saw Joe Morelli walk into the bar. Ranger saw him as well and moved directly toward him. Part of me wanted to get off the stool and join them. I wanted to know exactly what had happened. The other part of me wanted to be as far away from a Morelli-Ranger conversation as possible. The cowardly part of me won and I stayed put.

Their conversation was intense and of brief duration. Morelli turned and said something to the nearest police officer and he once again went to the PA. The bar was closing for the night and the patrons would be allowed to leave as soon as they registered their names and contact numbers with the police. Ranger made his way back through the crowd to my side.

"It's okay for you to leave," he told me. "You won't have to talk to anyone tonight."

"Ranger, what the hell is going on?" I asked. "I may not have to talk to anyone, but I want someone to talk to me!"

"I'll walk you to your car and tell you everything I know," he said. "And then I'll have to come back inside and talk to Morelli." Ranger was silent as we walked back toward the door. Physically, he was beside me, but mentally I wasn't even sure he was in the same galaxy. Remote didn't begin to describe the vibes I was getting from him. This wasn't the same man who had whispered in my ear about ending our Valentine's Day in his bed.

The night was mild for February, so I'd left my coat in the car when I'd entered the bar. Now I wished I had it, but I wasn't going to make any effort to open the door to get it. Ranger leaned casually against my car, showing no awareness of the chill. He was gathering his thoughts I hoped, but I was afraid he was mentally editing what he was going to tell me. I could be stubborn. I'd get the truth or freeze trying.

"When I broke things off with Elaina Mattas, she poisoned me," he said bluntly.

I gasped. "She poisoned you? When? How?"

"The same way she poisoned that young girl tonight. It was in this bar. I was here with Niko and she came over to our table and invited me to stay after Niko left. I agreed because although I'd already told her it was over between us, her actions told me she needed to hear it again. She set a drink in front of me, I took a sip and woke up at RangeMan with Bobby and Tank hovering over me."

"Oh, my gosh," I mumbled. I was shocked on two levels. Ranger had been poisoned and that was terrible. And Ranger had knowingly brought me to a place owned by a crazy woman to run interference for him. That was terrible, too.

He was watching my reaction to what he'd said as he continued. "Tank was at another table, watching, and he saw me go down. Elaina bragged to him that she'd poisoned me and he … extracted information from her about what the poison was she'd used. It's short acting and intense, but not fatal. The woman will recover, but she's going to have a rough couple of days."

I was right. I wasn't going to freeze to death listening to Ranger's story. My temper was starting to warm me up pretty good. "Ranger, how could you do this? You put me in harm's way!" I was hurt and I was disappointed. And I felt horrible for the poor innocent girl who'd downed a poison meant for me.

"I had no choice, Babe. La Muerte Blanca had to be identified at any cost, and it had to be done discreetly. I talked to Niko about my being in this bar, and he assured me Elaina had been dealt with after the incident with me. He said she would be no problem. I needed you with me in case things went bad, because I knew I could count on you to have my back."

My temper was easing back a little. I shouldn't have been so easily swayed by his words, but knowing Ranger trusted me so completely went a little way toward upgrading my puzzle piece analogy. I mean, any border piece just wouldn't do in this situation, right? Maybe he didn't realize what a big piece of the puzzle I was for him.

"I have to go back in, Babe. When I came out here Elaina was handcuffed to the Sub-Zero in the back bar room. She confessed to me and I gave a brief explanation to Morelli."

"All right," I said.

"I think I'm going to have to cancel on our dinner tonight, Babe. After Morelli is finished with me I have to go talk with Niko. It will be a late night."

"You tell Niko his sister is a whack job," I said. I shivered but I wasn't sure if it was due to the weather or the thought of how lucky I was that I wasn't in the hospital.

Ranger pulled me to him and wrapped his arms around me. His mouth covered mine with an intensity that let me know he wasn't as calm about the night's events as he seemed. The kiss seemed to go on forever. His tongue was in my mouth and his hands were on my back urging me closer. When he pulled away we were both breathing hard.

"Babe." I felt a tremor run through him and he pulled me in even closer. "Babe, I'm sorry." This was not the embrace of a man who thought of me only as a minor border piece. I was sure of it.

"I'll make up for the missed dinner," he told me.

"How? By flying me to Italy for an authentic dinner?"

"If that's what it takes then I will, but ... it may be a while. There may be more to La Muerte Blanca's presence here than Niko knows. I don't want you to be in any way involved in this. I don't want you linked to me if it would be dangerous for you."

"A little late for that consideration, Ranger. It was already dangerous for me, not to mention that poor girl, who should be somebody's fiancée now."

Ranger turned at the call of his name. I saw Joe Morelli walking down the sidewalk towards us. "I've got to go, Babe. I'll call you, hopefully soon."

"Yeah, that would be great, Ranger. Give me a ring sometime."

 ** _A/N: Thanks for reading. It's been a while since I've posted and I'm excited to be back with a new multi-chapter fanfic. For those who might be interested I've got an original novel available at Amazon, Barnes and Noble and several other online retailers ... Phaleeta's Obsession by Cathy Crowne. It deals with a woman's obsession with a fictional hero...you know what they say...write what you know!_**


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks to jago-ji for her sharp beta skills and her honest opinions. I couldn't do it without her.

May The Road Rise Up To Meet You

McNamara's Pub is an anomaly, even for the Burg. No credit cards accepted, and no waitress to bring your drink to the table. You stand at the bar until the bartender can take your order and then you hand cash over that same bar into an outstretched hand. It's the best Irish pub in Trenton and on St. Patrick's Day, it's _the_ place to be. And that was why Lula and I were there early. The parade had just ended and the place was filling rapidly. I had paid for two pints of Guinness, and Lula and I were standing at a high table near the back of the pub. I had a good view of the door, and was trying to block out Lula's complaints about the taste of the Guinness and the fact that she had to stand. I was only moderately successful.

I looked past the merrymakers and spotted the serious young man dressed in black. He was new, I supposed, because I didn't recognize him, but I recognized the uniform. He was good. I could tell he'd spotted us, but he was careful not to let his gaze linger. Not staring at Lula was a "tell," though. You'd have to have had plenty of Intel to pass over her without a double take. She was dressed for the holiday in a bright green spandex mini with a matching tube top. The shamrock earrings dangled nearly to her shoulders and were as big as saucers, and I thought they might glow in the dark. I hoped we weren't going to stay at McNamara's 'til after dark. It wasn't that I wasn't interested in the possibility of glow in the dark earrings. It was that I wanted to conclude our business quickly.

Seeing our RangeMan back-up at the door made me feel somewhat better about the fact I was going to try and pick up Mick Barnes. Mick was muscle for the Ramos family. A hired hand that wasn't big on brainpower, but he was … big. And mean. And FTA.

I hadn't seen or heard from Ranger since the Valentine's Day fiasco. For the first week I was avoiding him, so I didn't realize he was avoiding me. By the end of the third week I broke down and asked Connie what she knew, because she always knew something.

"I heard he's out of town," she'd told me. "Way out."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked.

"I bumped into Cal. He said Ranger was out of the country. In South America."

I immediately jumped to the conclusion that Ranger's trip had something to do the man he'd been trying to identify on Valentine's Day, La Muerte Blanca. Ranger had said his real name was Eduardo Vera, and he'd said it with such quiet intensity I knew the story would remain mostly untold. Connie's news had stunned me into doing something I tried never to do. I'd called Tank.

Tank had confirmed my suspicions. He said Ranger had been in Colombia on personal business, but he had been back in Trenton for a few days. And that opened up a whole new area for consideration.

Ranger always came to see me both before and after he left the country. Well, not always, because this time he hadn't shown up either time. Frequently, it was in the middle of the night and by the morning I had only a shadowy memory of his visit, but at least I'd had the shadow. The possibility of me being linked to Ranger, and Vera finding out seemed to be something Ranger wanted to avoid. He'd said it might be a while before I saw him again and apparently he was holding true to his word.

"How we gonna get this Mick Barnes?" Lula asked, breaking into my Ranger reverie. "He's one big dude, and he's mean. Or so I hear."

"Connie says he's not mean in a social setting, just when he's working," I said. "He'll be here. She said he's here even when it's not St. Patrick's Day, so he'll be here today for sure. We'll let him drink for a while and then we'll get him to come outside with us. And then we'll cuff him and take him in."

"That's your plan?" she asked. I nodded. "Hell, that's no plan at all. First off, what makes you think he'll come outside? An' second, what makes you think we can cuff him. He probably won't want to cooperate."

"First off," I repeated her words back to her, "Connie told me he has a thing for attractive plus-sized women, so we're using you for bait. And second, Connie also told me he doesn't handle his liquor well and the drunker he gets the more laid back he is. He's a happy drunk. This should be a piece of cake."

"I hope you're right, because I know how much you like your cake," Lula said. "Oh boy." She pulled a folded black and white photocopy out of her purse. "I think that's him," she said. She pointed to the guy who'd just entered the pub and was standing next to the unknown RangeMan. We checked the picture.

"Great!" I said. "That is him." I took a drink of my Guinness and watched as Mick made his way to the bar. He was obviously a regular, because he didn't order. Lula and I watched as the bartender poured a beer and then filled a shot glass with whiskey and carefully dropped the shot glass into the beer. My eyes widened as Mick upended the glass and drained it in one smooth motion. He slammed the stein back down on the bar with enough force that the empty shot glass rattled inside.

"Wow."

"Yeah, wow," Lula echoed. "I'm not so sure about that happy drunk report. I ain't never known anyone to drink a boilermaker and turn out a happy drunk. I'm putting my money on mean."

"Connie says not so," I insisted. "This will go fine. You'll see."

Six boilermakers later we implemented our plan. I thought we should wait another couple of boilermakers, but Lula was tired of standing. I was tired of hearing Lula complain that her five-inch Via Spigas were pinching her pinky toes, so I acquiesced.

My plan was to have Lula approach Mick and charm him out of the bar and into a location more favorable for capture. As I watched her wiggle her way through the crowded bar, I began to have second thoughts. Lula was a great friend, but she wasn't always the most dependable assistant. I needed this capture to go well. Rent was paid, but the cupboards were empty.

People parted for Lula as she made her way through the crowd. She led with her undeniably outstanding assets. Mick saw her coming and from the look in his eyes I thought Connie's Intel had been right. He was almost drooling by the time she reached his side, but I wasn't sure if that was from the impact of an approaching Lula or the six boilermakers.

They talked for a minute before Mick turned to the bartender and motioned for drinks. I watched with astonishment as Lula, under Mick's tutelage, downed a boilermaker in almost as smooth a fashion as Mick himself. That put his drink count at seven, or maybe fourteen if you counted the beer and the whiskey separately. I was relieved when I saw him put his arm around Lula and move her toward the door. She turned her head over her shoulder and raised one eyebrow as she caught my eye. That was my cue to make my way to the door as well.

Unfortunately, I didn't have Lula's attributes to help me part the crowd. I started to panic, afraid that I'd lose them. I thought Lula's past experience with men would be enough to keep her safe from Mick, so I wasn't too worried about her, but I didn't want to miss my chance to collect a nice reward.

I was only five feet from the door, but there were two men in kilts playing bagpipes between me and the exit, and I was having trouble breaking through. Lula and Mick had exited the bar a good thirty seconds before and I was getting nervous. I wasn't sure where they'd go. A hand grasped my arm and pulled gently. "This way, ma'am." I looked up to see the young RangeMan. He maneuvered me through gaps in the crowd and suddenly we were on the sidewalk in front of the bar. I took a second to adjust to the glaring light of the afternoon and then turned to look at the unfamiliar operative.

He smiled and said, "Tank said I should offer my services, if necessary. Would you like me to help you with your take-down?" I remembered Mick and Lula, and turned and looked up and down the sidewalk. They were nowhere in sight.

"Crud," I said. "We're too late. We've lost them."

"No, ma'am," he said. "I took the precaution of placing a tracker in your friend's purse as they left the bar. RangeMan will have their twenty, uh location, I mean."

I stared at him for a moment. I hadn't been spending much time around RangeMan lately. That's probably why I didn't know the newbie standing next to me. Even though he was new, he'd been good enough to slip a tracker into Lula's pocketbook and as was typical of all RangeMen, he seemed to have everything under control. "I'm Stephanie Plum," I said.

"Yes, ma'am, I know."

"Then call me Stephanie, or Bomber, or Steph or Beautiful or whatever the other guys call me. But call me ma'am again and I'll shoot you. I am not anyone's ma'am. Got that?"

"Yes, ma'am, I mean…uh, nice to meet you, Steph. I'm Huey." He stuck out his hand and I shook it, and then looked around his massive bulk, down the sidewalk.

"We're not gonna need your tracker, Huey," I said. He turned and saw what had caught my eye. Lula and Mick had just exited a liquor store. Mick had one arm wrapped around a bottle-shaped brown paper bag and the other wrapped around Lula's waist. He was laughing as they made their way down the street, and I could see his gait was unsteady. Connie's Intel had been correct. He looked drunk and happy. Once again Lula looked back and our eyes met. Show time.

I slipped my hand into my shoulder bag and carefully fingered the cuffs. They were perfectly positioned for a one-handed pull from the bag and a slap around an unsuspecting wrist. If that didn't work my small canister of pepper spray was uncapped and ready to go, and if there were two strikes, then my stun gun was charged and at the ready in my outside pocket. That one would undoubtedly be the home run.

Huey and I walked in tandem, at a pace faster and straighter than the meandering stroll of Mick and Lula. As we approached them from behind, Lula reached down and placed her hand on top of Mick's hand at her waist. "Let me help you get a better grip, honey." She moved his hand in what Mick thought was a flirtatious gesture, but instead was an opportunity for me. I reached into my purse, and then lunged forward. I was rewarded by the solid click of the cuff as it tightened around his wrist. I reached for the other arm. I missed.

Mick whirled and turned to look at me. "What the fuck?" he slurred in drunken astonishment. His eyes narrowed, and I realized this was no laid back happy drunk any longer. Lula had been right on the money. Seven boilermakers meant mean. Mick turned to look at Lula and then at me. "You're that damn bounty hunter," he said, and then he lunged at me with surprising speed and coordination. I felt his big meaty hand wrap around my neck.

Huey came out of nowhere with a punch that rocked Mick's head backwards, but Mick didn't let go of me. My vision was tunneling from lack of air when Mick's eyes widened and he finally loosened his grip. Lula had planted one pointy-toed Via Spiga deep in Mick's crotch. Mick doubled forward, his cuffed hand grabbing at his injured scrotum. There was the sound of breaking glass as the paper-covered bottle hit the ground, and Mick's free hand went into his pocket.

Huey rushed in to contain Mick, but Mick hadn't completely given up. As they struggled I heard a pop-pop and saw Huey crumple and fall to the ground. He'd been shot. I was still trying to get my breath back as I saw Lula pull a stun gun from her purse and make a direct hit on Mick.

I put my hand to my neck to assess the damage from Mick's chokehold, and my hand came away bloody. Then I remembered there had been two pops. I'd been shot, too! My field of vision dimmed and narrowed, and I was looking at the world from the far end of a long dark tunnel. I felt a little relieved that there wasn't a bright light at the end of the tunnel, but my relief was short lived because of what I did see—the pavement heading straight for my face as I lost consciousness.

I came to lying on my back with Lula standing over me, her giant shamrock earrings swinging hypnotically in front of my face, and a burning pain on the side of my neck.

"Good, you're alive. I think the bullet just grazed you, but I'm not so sure about the RangeMan dude. I called 911, but I might have to leave before the cops come. I don't like cops," she said.

I heard my phone start to ring, but didn't make an immediate move. I was still trying to process the fact that I'd been shot. I was slightly aware of Lula grabbing my purse and pulling out my phone.

"Uh oh," she said, looking at the caller ID. "It's Ranger." She handed me my cell phone.

I took the phone, pushed the connect button and croaked out, "Hello."

"Huey just sent a 10-78 to RangeMan. Are you all right?"

"I think so," I said. Even in my fuzzy state I had the good sense not to mention I'd been shot. I had no idea what a 10-78 was, but I was glad Huey had been able to summon help. I lifted my head and looked over to see him lying partly under an unmoving Mick. "He's been shot," I told Ranger. "Lula called 911. I don't know if he's badly hurt."

"I'm not badly hurt." The strained voice was an indication that Huey was in pain, but I thought it was a good sign he was talking. "He says he's not badly hurt," I said.

"Babe!" I heard the exasperation in Ranger's voice, and I realized he'd been talking to me as I'd been listening to Huey. "Who shot him? Tank has audio of you threatening to shoot him. Did you shoot him?"

"No!" I exclaimed on a raspy exhale. "Mick Barnes shot him."

There was a moment's silence and then Ranger asked, "Do you mean the Mick Barnes who is on Niko Mattas' payroll?"

I touched my hand tentatively to the burning pain on the side of my neck. It came away covered in fresh blood. "I'm bleeding, and I don't want to talk anymore," I said.

"I'm on my way." He disconnected and that's when the day really started to go downhill.

I was still lying on the sidewalk on my back with my phone in one hand and my bloody hand lying across my shirt. I heard Huey talking to Lula, who was apparently following his directions to finish my aborted cuffing job. I thought I should help so I sat up and waited for the world to quit spinning. I vaguely remembered falling forward onto the sidewalk. I dropped my phone and tentatively probed my face with my clean hand. I could feel a patch of roughened skin on my cheek. Thankfully, I hadn't landed on my nose. I took silent inventory and found the only major problem was the burning on the side of my neck. I touched the area again and there seemed to be less blood, so maybe I hadn't lied to Ranger. Maybe I was okay.

I heard a siren in the distance. If I wanted to avoid an ambulance ride, I needed to be able to convince everyone else I was okay, too, so I stood. My head was spinning but I camouflaged the dizziness by leaning against a lamppost. Finally, when most of the dizziness had subsided, I sat on the curb.

Lula, who looked remarkably unfazed by what had gone on, teetered up to me. "I think it's time for me to go," she said. "I got ole Mick all secured, and Huey here is going to be okay. He's just got a thigh wound. Lucky for him it missed all his junk. I imagine the hospital will get him fixed up in no time. You okay, Stephanie?"

"I don't know," I said. "I think I am. Is my face all scraped up?"

"Not too bad," Lula said. "When you fell you landed part way on Huey. I rolled you off to make sure you was okay. That neck wound don't look too serious." She looked beyond me. "I see flashing lights coming. I need to go. I get the hives from cops."

"Okay," I said. "But if they ask I'll have to tell them you were here."

"Yeah, they'll come find me, but that's okay. I can handle one at a time, it's just when I see a bunch at once I get nervous. Anyways, my feet are hurting. I gotta go home and get these shoes off." And then I was alone with a semi-conscious skip and a wounded RangeMan.

The TPD was first on the scene. Joe and I weren't together and the department knew that, but I still carried some sort of immunity. Most of the cops treated me like a sister and today was no exception. By the time the detective, not Morelli thankfully, arrived on the scene, Mick had been transported. I had a promise that the paperwork would be taken to Connie, so I was going to have my payday without actually going in to the station. Ranger showed up along with Tank. He looked in my direction, but I was busy having the wound on my neck dressed, so he turned his attention to Huey who was on a gurney and being hoisted into an ambulance.

As the ambulance pulled away with sirens blaring and lights flashing, Ranger came to me. He stared but made no comment about the dried blood that had stiffened my curls. The bandage made it uncomfortable to turn my head so I moved my whole body in an attempt to return his gaze.

"It's not as bad as it looks," I said. "They didn't even hassle me about going to the hospital, they just put the bandage on. The bullet only grazed me."

"We'll talk about it later," he said. "I'm going to the hospital. Huey has no family in the area and I need to be there. I'm having Tank take you home."

"That's not necessary," I said. "My car is parked down the block."

"I know where your car is," he replied. "Detective Simon wants to have a word with you, and then Tank will take you home." He turned and walked away and left me staring open-mouthed after him. He was acting almost Morelli-like. I hadn't seen the man in over a month and now he was walking into my take-down and taking over.

Okay, to be fair, his man had been shot trying to help me, so maybe he did have some right to be there. I didn't ask him to send a man to watch over Lula and me, but I also didn't tell the guy to get lost. And what did he mean he had audio of me threatening to shoot Huey? I mean, I guess I did say something like that, but I wasn't serious, and what the hell business did Ranger have listening to anything I said? I was working myself into a fine temper and the madder I got the more my neck throbbed. It was time to do something about that. The hell I was waiting for Tank!

I looked around and realized no one was paying attention to me, including Detective Simon. Brian Simon knew where I lived and if he really needed a statement he could come find me. I turned and walked back toward McNamara's and to where my car was parked. As I rounded the building, I came to a sudden stop. My car was gone. Who would steal that piece of crap?

"No one," Tank said from behind me, which made me realize I'd spoken out loud. I swung around to face him. "Your car is in the lot at your apartment by this time," Tank told me. "Detective Simon was insisting that you be transported to the emergency room, but Ranger promised him he'd make sure you didn't drive home and wouldn't be staying alone. Simon relented and that's why you're not on your way to St. Francis with Huey."

"Oh." It was an inadequate response, but it was all I had. I knew Tank was a good guy, a real company man, but he could push my buttons. He had a way of making me feel silly and superfluous, and I was feeling completely that way at the moment. I shrugged my shoulders and gave in. Tank took my arm and turned me back toward the scene of the crime where I could see a RangeMan SUV. I pulled my arm away. "I can make it on my own," I told him.

He took hold of my arm once again. "I know you can," he said, "but you seem a little unsteady." This time I completely gave up and let him hang on to me for the walk back. To an onlooker he may have looked chivalrous, but he was really making sure I wouldn't bolt. Following Ranger's orders was serious business for Tank.

I hauled myself into the seat of the SUV and buckled in. As we drove off, I turned to Tank. "What's the deal?" I asked. "RangeMan listens in on all my conversations now?"

"Not that I'm aware of."

"Then how did Ranger know I'd said I'd shoot Huey if he didn't quit calling me ma'am?"

"RangeMan was listening to Huey. He's a new guy and on probation. He's wired."

"You sent a new guy to watch over me?"

"Yeah, and that was my call. I'll pay for that mistake. I had no idea you were going after Mick Barnes. If I had, I would have sent a team."

"Are you implying I wasn't capable of bringing him in?" I asked. Tank answered by taking his eyes off the road for a full five seconds while he gave me a telling stare.

"As I said, I made a mistake sending Huey, and I expect to pay for it."

"I could tell Ranger was angry," I said. "I thought maybe he was mad at me for a minute, but I guess he was upset with you, then."

"Ranger doesn't get mad, Stephanie. You should know that. He gets even. And I imagine he will have something to say to you."

"You think he's going to try and get even with me? What the hell for? He's stayed out of my life ever since Valentine's Day. This was a heck of a day to step back into it."

When we got to my apartment I saw my car parked in the far back corner of the lot. I knew the keys were still in my purse and I wondered for a moment, but then gave it up. All RangeMen have mysterious ways. It must be part of the job requirement.

"Do you need me to come up with you?" Tank asked.

"No." I didn't need it and I didn't want it. I felt very uncomfortable in his presence. He'd done nothing to make me feel that way, but I knew. I knew he thought I was a twit. I knew he disapproved every time Ranger bailed me out, and I knew he'd never verbalize that to Ranger, but I thought he might tell me someday, and I didn't want today to be the day. I left him standing on the sidewalk by the back entrance as I pushed through the door. I didn't look back, and when I got into my apartment I didn't look out. I knew he'd stay until he made sure I was safe. Ranger would want him to.

I went into the bathroom and took a good look at the tub. I'd scrubbed it just two weeks before, so it wasn't too bad. I stuffed a washcloth in the overflow drain, turned the water on full force and dumped a generous amount of my favorite body wash into the hot water. As I peeled off my clothes, I watched the water level rise dangerously high. I stepped in and slowly immersed myself in the tub. I could hear the small trickle of water escaping around the edges of the plugged drain, but my trick had worked and I'd turned my 1970s tub into a deep soaker tub. I closed my eyes and let Bulgari take me away.

I managed to rinse the blood out of my hair without ruining the nice bandage job done by the paramedics, and as I stood and toweled off, I was feeling much better. I wrapped the towel loosely around me and held it in place for warmth as my skin adjusted to the air. I had a very soft, well-worn RangeMan t-shirt that I was going to slip into. I was staying in for the rest of the day. I thought I could dig up something for supper, then I was going to have an early night.

Maybe it was because I was wrapped in a cloud of Bulgari from my bath, or maybe it was because he hadn't been there in so long, but I had no early warning. I was surprised and startled to see Ranger sitting in the corner armchair, his legs stretched out in front of him. I squeaked out an "eek!" but he made no sound. His eyes were on me though, right where I was holding the towel together. His elbows were resting on the arms of the chair, his fingers steepled. Someone who knew him less well might have thought he was at ease. I knew from past experience, the position was one he adopted when he was trying to hold on to his temper.

Ranger, in my apartment after a long absence, holding on to his temper. That was enough to make my temper rise. "You've got some nerve, Ranger. It's been a while since you've been here. For all you know I could have had company."

"Tank was on guard until I got here. I knew you didn't have company." His voice was quiet and well-modulated, another sure sign he was wearing his "Mr. In Control" persona. If I was one of the guys, he'd have taken me to the mats, but he couldn't do that with me. He was going to have to work out his temper another way. I gulped involuntarily when I figured out what way that would be. But wait a minute. What the hell was he upset about? There was no reason for him to be upset.

"What are you doing here, Ranger?" I thought I saw the slight rise of one eyebrow. It might surprise him that I'd asked. We both knew what he was doing or what he thought he was going to do. "And why are you angry? I didn't shoot your employee. Mick Barnes did. It wasn't my fault. Geez, you're starting to act like Morelli, blaming me for things that are really out of my control." I saw the immediate reaction to Morelli's name. Stupid, stupid, stupid, Stephanie, I chided myself.

"Is Morelli part of your life again?" Ranger asked.

"No."

"Are you certain?"

"Yes, I'm certain. I don't like your implication. I'm not a liar." I was getting a little testy, myself.

"I didn't say you were a liar," Ranger replied in a voice that may have been just a little less well-modulated than earlier. He stood from the chair, his gaze once again on my hand which was clenched tightly around the towel. "Morelli was at the hospital this afternoon," Ranger said tersely. "He came rushing in because he heard you'd been shot."

"The TPD grapevine," I said.

"He may not be part of your life, but judging from the look on his face, you're still part of his. He was … relieved … to find that you were okay. I thought he might have come by, but Tank assured me he had not."

"It's been a long time since Joe or any man has been in my apartment. You're the only one who comes in without invitation."

"Am I not welcome, Stephanie?"

The question hung in the air. I couldn't answer. No matter what I said it would be part truth, part lie. I wanted him, no doubt, but lately, I'd come to the conclusion I needed more. So part of me did want him gone—the part that was mature, and self-protective. The rest of me wanted him to stay. Without warning his hands pulled the hem of his t-shirt from his cargos. Five seconds later it was carelessly discarded on the floor and that little part of me that wanted him to leave—left.

"Ranger."

"Babe."

I couldn't move as he approached me. His hand rested on top of mine, and my grip on the towel melted. I felt a brief flash of cool air against my skin as the towel fell, and then I felt Ranger's body against mine. I lifted my head to meet his gaze and winced as the bandage on my neck pulled. There was no tenderness in his eyes, only determination. Ranger and I had a history, so I knew exactly what was going to happen next.

We were going to have angry sex. Well, if not angry sex, maybe a little pissed off sex. It was going to be fast, hard and wonderful. He wouldn't disappoint. He would give me such pleasure that when he left, the pain of being alone would be my punishment for whatever wrong I had supposedly done.

There wouldn't be any words of love, or commitment. That was the unsettling pattern we'd fallen into. Secretly, I knew on some level I needed a commitment from him, and knowing it wasn't going to happen I was still powerless to stop him. As his lips touched mine, I was a goner. And when the first cries of completion filled the room they were mine, because Ranger had an agenda. He wouldn't take his pleasure until he'd given me all I could stand. It was a mission for him, and Ranger always completed his missions successfully.

I awoke in the middle of the night and reached a hand out, feeling relieved when I brushed the soft velvety skin of my bedmate. I could see from the moonlight filtering through the mostly closed drapes, he was asleep. I smiled. I couldn't help it. Ranger had taken me to bed in full opportunist mode. That meant we had both been winners, several times over. If it hadn't been tender, it had been satisfying.

I got quietly out of bed and made my way to the bathroom. After I took care of the necessary business, I carefully removed the bandage on my neck. It was pulling the little hairs at my hairline and I wanted to readjust it. I also wanted to get a good look at my wound.

It looked like a big hickey. The bullet had just grazed the skin and the area underneath the bandage was raw and weeping. I thought I might be left with an interesting scar.

I looked closer and saw the beating of my pulse directly underneath the wound. I watched that pulse for a long time and then with shaking hands I turned out the light and made my way back to the bedroom, where I searched in the dark and found my t-shirt. I pulled it on quietly with my still unsteady hands and made my way into the living room. I collapsed on the sofa. Now my entire body was shaking, not just my hands.

While I had been looking in the mirror I became aware of the seriousness of what had happened. If the bullet had gone a quarter inch deeper it would have hit my carotid artery. I probably would have bled to death before help came. The realization of what hadn't happened to me washed over me like cold water down my neck. My body convulsed and I felt sick to my stomach. I needed to get up and move around to dispel the rush of emotion that was causing me to tremble, but I felt as though my legs wouldn't support me.

Ranger's anger and his description of Joe's anxiety made sense now. I almost died. And maybe Tank's curtness was understandable, too. Ranger was important to him, and I was the cause of a lot of angst for Ranger.

I looked up as Ranger, magnificent wearing nothing at all, came into the living room. When our eyes met I burst into tears. He was across the room and crouched in front of me before I knew what was happening.

"Babe?"

"I'm s-s-sorry," I said. "I just realized how close I came to dying today. I don't want to die, Ranger. I mean, my life sucks some days, but it's the only one I've got. And it wasn't my fault. It wasn't. It should have worked perfectly. Connie said he was laid back when he was drinking. I don't know how it went wrong." I started sobbing deeply and Ranger moved to the couch beside me. He pulled me to him and held me tightly. One hand moved up and down my back, stroking gently while the other held me close. He comforted me with words softly spoken in Spanish. I didn't understand, but hearing his voice in my ear helped, and slowly I regained my composure.

"Babe," he said. "It's okay. You're okay." I heard something in his voice. A quaver. I pulled back to look at him and now he was trembling. "I hated seeing Morelli twisted in knots earlier at the hospital," he said. "I kept thinking, _poor dumb bastard. Get over her._ And all the time I was twisted in the same fucking knots, even though I knew you weren't seriously hurt."

"I was angry when I got here, but it was an anger driven by fear. Stephanie, for the last month I have been setting a plan in motion to rid the world of La Muerte Blanca. Of all the people in my past, he would be the one who would mostly likely try to get at me by harming someone I … someone important to me. I stayed away from you to keep you safe, and then I come back and find out you've almost done to yourself what I was trying to protect you from."

"I was just doing _my job_ ," I said.

"I know, Babe. I feel like it's _my job_ to protect you though, and today, I and RangeMan didn't do our job very well. My gut clenched when I saw you sitting on the curb with blood all over your shirt. I came here earlier pissed off and wanting to tear into you, but when I saw you I wanted you so badly, the only thing I could think about was you, naked, under me."

A rush of heat shot through me. "And you naked under me," I said tentatively, "and you naked be…" my words were cut off as his mouth descended on mine. He stood, and I could see proof that he wanted me again as he bent down and lifted me into his arms. It was a slow journey from the couch back to my bed. Ranger can kiss, and that night he elevated his kissing to an art form in itself.

We went back to bed and spent hours making love. Long, languorous movements that brought about a new level of pleasure. I saw Ranger tremble with need but deny himself until he was sure I'd been satisfied, and when we were done, we rested and then began again. He spoke in Spanish, which I didn't understand, but I understood the need, and the intensity in his eyes. I reveled in his cries of release and let them intermingle with mine.

And as I fell asleep, I knew. There was no doubt. He loved me; he needed me. We had entered into a new level of our relationship. Because there was a relationship. He had committed with his body and his words, even if they weren't spoken in a language I understood. The message still came through loud and clear. I fell asleep finally as dawn was breaking.

When I awoke several hours later I was aware of a slight throbbing in my neck. Our lovemaking had exacerbated the wound, but the pain was worth it. I turned to let my eyes linger on my lover, but the bed was empty. A tiny wave of nausea started in my gut, but I tamped it down. I got up and made a quick tour of the apartment. All the locks were locked and the security bolt was in place, but Ranger, my lover, was gone. Did I imagine his need, his desire, his commitment?

There was a knock at the door. I hurried back to the bedroom and pulled on my RangeMan shirt. I didn't look through the peephole. I didn't stop to think that Ranger never knocked. I slid back the bolts, turned the locks and pulled the door open, eager to see where he'd gone, and with a smile, I thought maybe he'd brought back donuts.

Nikomedes Mattas, dressed in an impeccable gray suit leaned casually against my door frame. "Stephanie, agápi mou, I regret the circumstances, but we must talk." Without waiting for further invitation, he walked in. I looked into the hallway. No Ranger. WTF?


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: I always say I couldn't do this without the beta skills of my friend, jago-ji. This is particularly true for this chapter. Sometimes words pour out easily, and sometimes they don't. Sometimes they have to be pulled from the author and thank goodness, jago-ji is not only willing to pull, but occasionally poke and prod! I make the promise to my readers, the next installment will come quicker! In rereading this chapter and thinking about the course of this story it has come to mind that the theme of Holidaze is similar to a recently published fanfiction, Blurred Lines by snapesgirl21. I'm hoping there is an audience for two similarly themed fanfictions. If you haven't read Blurred Lines, I recommend it. And now ... on with the show._

 **Easter Anxiety**

I folded the body receipt in half and shoved it deep into the side pocket of my purse. "Thanks for your help, Lula. I couldn't have done it without you," I said.

"No problem. Florene can be a little testy early in the morning, but you promising to have Connie come down and write her bond early made her a little more cooperative."

"Yeah," I replied. "She wasn't as mean as I thought she'd be, but I still don't think she'd have come easily if it weren't for you."

"Buckle up," Lula told me as she pulled her Firebird out of the TPD parking lot. "It's true I did help with Florene. I understand her. Workin' girls don't like to be taken off the street during workin' hours, but I knew she'd come in early. Not much business on Sunday mornings."

"Still, she must have something planned," I said. "She was adamant that we get her bonded out quickly."

"Church," Lula said.

"Church? You mean she's going to church?" I asked in amazement.

"Sure, everybody goes to church on Easter." There was silence in the car as I pondered this statement.

"That's kind of surprising," I said.

"Why?" Lula challenged, "cause she's a ho? Hoes go to church."

"Did you?"

"Damn skippy, I did. I still do. Every Christmas and Easter. I never miss. Only reason I helped you this morning is the rain cancelled my church's sunrise service. I'll have to find a later service. Right now I need to find a breakfast sandwich, or a donut. I'm starving."

"I don't know if there's any place open on Easter," I said. I was feeling a little guilty because I hadn't been planning on going to church.

"What about a Jewish bakery?" Lula asked. "You know where there's a Jewish bakery? I bet they'd be open on Easter."

I didn't know of any Jewish bakeries, but the 7/11 was open and doing a bang-up business, even early with the rain pouring down.

I ran in and got a box of butterscotch krimpets and two bottles of orange juice, and we sat in the parking lot while we ate.

"Maybe I'll go to the Catholic church," Lula said. "I haven't been to a Catholic church in a long time. What time is Mass?"

"Ten-thirty, at the Cathedral," I said.

"Ten-thirty. Hmmm, that what time you're going?" she asked.

"I wasn't planning on going. I thought it might take a little longer to get Florene, so I didn't make any solid plans."

"Say what? Not going to church on Easter?" Lula seemed astounded. "You should go. Your momma and your granny will be upset if you don't go." She was right in that assumption, as least as far as my mother went. I wasn't sure if anything upset Grandma Mazur.

"I might go," I said, reconsidering. I had a lot of thinking to do and church was a good place to think. And if I went I'd lose the guilt I'd pretend I didn't have for not going.

It was still early when Lula dropped me off, and the morning stretched in front of me, cold, wet and solitary. Suddenly going to Mass didn't seem like such a bad idea. I went into my apartment and started taming the curls the rain had enhanced into something more Easter appropriate.

An hour later, I genuflected and crossed myself before I slid into the pew. I was always amazed at how easily I fell back into the rituals of the religion I'd been raised with. I looked quickly around and was relieved to see no one I recognized. My mother would have been elated to see me at Mass, and that's why I had made my way to the Cathedral. It was far from the neighborhood church where she and Grandma would be attending Easter Mass.

I glanced down at my sedate navy sheath. Thanks to Elaina Mattas I had an almost new Easter outfit. I'd purchased the dress because the assistant DA asked me to wear something conservative. My testimony had been partly responsible for the guilty verdict that had come back against Elaina Mattas for poisoning the young girl at the Radius Bar on Valentine's Day, and I felt good about that. It was about the only aspect of my recent life that I could view in a positive light. Ranger had been a no-show at the trial, but they had a deposition from him. He was out of the country again, and although it wasn't said where, my money was on Colombia.

My life had been on a downhill slide since the morning I'd awakened to find Ranger missing from my bed. The night before had been heaven, and I felt myself warming as I remembered it. I looked up, guiltily, but it seemed no one around me could read my mind. That was good, because I wasn't sure how appropriate it was to be remembering mind-blowing, body-spasming sex while I was sitting in a church pew, even if it was one at the very, very back.

There was a slight stirring of the occupants at the end of the pew, and I looked to see Lula carefully stepping past the wiry old man who'd planted himself at the end of the pew and working her way toward me. She was wearing a key-lime green suit, with matching pumps, and on her arm she was carrying the reason she'd agreed to help me with Florene earlier. It was her new key-lime Brahmin, which she had purchased the old fashioned way—at Macy's as opposed to the trunk of Joey Scotto's Crown Vic. She'd built the entire outfit around her purse, and I'd heard her worrying all week about the money she'd spent. Her share of the capture money would probably pay for the purse, if not the outfit.

She smiled as she settled in next to me and I smiled back. She looked great. It was true, I'd come to the Cathedral to avoid my mother, but suddenly it felt nice to have someone I knew next to me.

I had some decisions to make, and church was a good place to make them. The time had come to quit procrastinating and think the situation through from beginning to end. Or maybe I was going to think things through from end to beginning, because, maybe, the morning I woke up to find Ranger gone was the end. The end of Ranger and me. If that was so, then did my new beginning involve Niko? Unconsciously, I lifted my face toward the front of the church. I needed some clarity, and I heard the words _help me_ form silently in my mind.

My mouth formed a silent "oh" with the realization. I was praying. And remembering.

 _Niko had seen my distress the moment he'd walked through my door. He'd misinterpreted the cause, though._ _"Stephanie,_ _agáp_ _i_ _mou, I regret the circumstances, but we must talk."_

 _His eyes focused on the bandage on my neck for a moment before they slid down my body. I became aware of the edge of the RangeMan t-shirt brushing the skin high on my thighs. "I-I'll be right back," I stammered. I turned from him as circumspectly as I could and made my way back to my bedroom. When I came back into the living room I was wearing a bra under the RangeMan shirt and a well-worn old pair of Joe's sweats he had never reclaimed._

 _Niko was sitting perfectly still on the sofa, one leg crossed over the other. It would have been an effeminate pose for some men, but his innate elegance helped him pull it off. He patted the cushion in an indication I should sit next to him. I ignored him and sat in the armchair across the room._

" _Stephanie, I want to apologize for Mick. The attack on you never should have happened and I'm accepting full responsibility for it."_

" _I'm not sure what you mean," I said. "He's been arrested. It's pretty clear he'll be taking responsibility for his crime. And it wasn't just me. He shot one of Ranger's men who was helping us with the takedown."_

" _Yes, of course," Niko agreed with me. "What I meant is I will be responsible for any expense you incur because of your injury, and the RangeMan employee's as well. Carlos and I have a good working arrangement which is beneficial to both of us. It needs to stay that way._ _And I'll make sure you never have to tangle with Mick again. My employees know better than to miss their court dates. They have the entire legal team of the corporation available to any one of them. To miss a court date is unconscionable. Mick's behavior will be dealt with by the police of course, but he will also have to answer to me."_

 _That was good to hear, but I wasn't sure why Niko was here telling me. He stood and walked toward my chair. I was unsure of his intention, so I stood. One professionally-manicured, supple hand reached out to stroke my neck at the edge of the bandage. "You must let me make this up to you," he said._

" _No really, it's not necessary."_

 _Niko's eyes widened and he seemed to notice my dishabille for the first time. His eyes went around me and focused on my bedroom door. "I'm sorry. I'm interrupting."_

" _No," I said. "You're not. I'm still not quite myself after … yesterday." Well, that was completely the truth._

" _I thought you would have called me before now," he said, a slight smile pulling at the corners of his mouth._

" _Called you?" I asked._

" _I gave you my card. We had a very pleasant beginning, and I thought you'd call. There was something between us that evening that I thought would be worth investigating. I'll admit, my ego was a little dented when you didn't call immediately, but I've never completely given up the hope that we would connect."_

 _He was talking about the night he'd almost convinced me to go home with him from the Radius Bar. "Well, my life has been a little complicated," I said. "And the last time I was at the Radius Bar, your sister tried to kill me. That didn't exactly make me eager to call."_

" _I can understand that," Niko said with what I took to be a self-deprecating, but charming smile. "Also, I think you have been spending time with my friend, Carlos. I can understand how that would make you hesitant to call as well."_

" _I occasionally work for Ranger," I said. "I was working the night Elaina tried to poison me."_

" _Elaina," he said with a long drawn out sigh. "Yet another thing I need to make up to you. Let me take you to dinner. It won't begin to repay my debt, but maybe you'll come to see I am not cut from the disreputable cloth you must imagine."_

" _I'm not sure…"_

" _I won't take no for an answer," he said, interrupting me. "I'll be in touch." He leaned forward and dusted his lips over mine. My lips which were still swollen from Ranger's passion. And then Niko let himself out of my apartment._

I became aware of movement around me and realized that everyone else was standing. Mass had started. I heard Lula's rich contralto voice and looked to see her holding a hymnal. I'd heard her sing before with Sally Sweet and Grandma Mazur and it hadn't been good. Church singing seemed to be her forte. I reached down and picked up a hymnal from the small rack on the back of the pew and made an effort to find the correct page, but my mind drifted again.

In the four weeks since I'd been shot, I'd seen Niko four times. The first time was when he'd apologized for Mick Barnes. The fourth time was last night when he said it was time to take our friendship to the next level. I knew the next level meant the horizontal level. I'd put him off for as long as I could. I had a decision to make.

It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out Nick was interested in me for more than just a casual fling. I wasn't sure what exactly it was that he wanted, but it involved Ranger. I couldn't decide if he was fishing for information, or trying to get to Ranger by sleeping with me. Niko had the warped idea that I was somehow important to Ranger, and he and Ranger had some kind of a deal going on. Maybe he thought sleeping with me would give him a leg up on Ranger in whatever bad business was going on between them. I used to think, or at least hope, I was an important cog in Ranger's wheel, but Ranger's disappearing act the morning after we'd made love had me reconsidering my place in his world.

I was in shock and in no little amount of emotional pain after Ranger left, and when Niko called the next week, I found myself agreeing to go to dinner with him. If I was smart enough to realize he had an ulterior motive in seeking my company he must have realized I had one, too. I had hoped that by spending time with him I could learn more about La Muerte Blanca, aka Eduardo Vera. Because I was sure Ranger's disappearing act and the distance he'd been keeping from me were tied into the appearance of Vera in the Radius Bar on Valentine's Day. Niko was deft at turning every conversational gambit I made away from Vera or anything remotely concerning what I still considered to be Ramos business.

Despite my thwarted mission to gather information, I'd enjoyed the time we spent together. I was starting to change my agenda. Niko was not the kind of man I could bring home to the Plum family dinner table, but he might be just the thing to get me over the huge hit I'd suffered to my self-confidence and pride. Sure, it would only be a physical relationship with Niko—I was way too smart to let myself get emotionally involved with him—but maybe physical was just what I needed.

It might have the added bonus of making Ranger a little jealous. I was still convinced Ranger had feelings for me and maybe getting to know Niko a lot better would bring some of those feelings to the surface. Ranger always told me he doesn't share and that's the truth. With the exception of the unexpected tenderness and need he'd showed when we were last together, he'd never shared his emotions. He'd never shared much of his day-to-day personal life with me. These days he didn't even share his time with me. Maybe it was time to see if me sharing my time with Niko would bring Ranger around. I would be using Niko, but I thought his ego could take the dent.

The question was, could I actually sleep with Niko? I didn't think I could, if Ranger was still in the picture. I'd juggled Ranger and Morelli for a long time until both Joe and I realized it wasn't working. And Ranger had accepted that I was sleeping with Joe and him at the same time. Ranger probably wouldn't handle Niko and me as well, but if there was no me and Ranger, then …

The people in the pew in front of me stood and began to move toward the aisle. I realized with a start that it was communion time. Mass was almost over and I'd spent the entire time contemplating having an affair with Niko. Not the typical mindset of a good Catholic girl, I was certain. The heat at the back of my neck was guilt, surely, but then, maybe not. As I looked toward the altar, I saw a flash of black as a man exited a pew near the front and turned down the side aisle away from the congregation. I stood on the kneeler bench for a better look but the man had disappeared behind the confessional, and presumably slipped out the side entrance.

A man wearing black on Easter. The heat at the back of my neck grew. Ranger had come to church on Easter. As the people in my row moved toward the aisle and toward communion, I joined them, but turned to the back of the church and headed for the exit. I heard the tap-tap-tap of Lula's heels behind me. It seemed my prayer of what to do next had been answered, because surely seeing Ranger in church was a sign. It was time to find Ranger and talk.

I ran down the steps and peered around the corner of the church. Lula came up behind me. "Are you okay? You ran out of there like you seen a ghost."

"Not a ghost," I said. "Look." I pointed to a black Porsche 911 Turbo that made a right turn out of the parking lot and headed away from us, toward Broad Street and presumably Haywood.

"Damn!" Lula said. "Batman goes to church on Easter, too. Wonder why he left early?"

"I don't know," I said. "Mass was almost over, maybe he just wanted to avoid the crowd." Or me I thought. Maybe he'd seen Lula and me and hadn't wanted to chance an encounter after Mass. This had to end. Today was the day.

"Do you have plans?" I asked Lula. "I need a favor from you."

"I'll do it if I can," she said.

"I need you to go to my parents' house and tell Mom I stayed after Mass to help serve Easter dinner to the homeless. Tell them I'll be by later this evening and to save some leftovers for me. Then Mom will invite you to lunch. There will be ham and scalloped potatoes."

"Fuckin' A, I'll do it," Lula said enthusiastically. "Next to bacon, Easter ham is the best."

The light misting rain that had plagued us earlier suddenly turned into a full on rainfall. I shouted my thanks to Lula as I took off for my car at a run. A few minutes later I pulled into the RangeMan parking garage and wheeled into the first open space. Ranger's Turbo was in its usual spot. There were still drops of rain beaded on its shiny surface. I never had any doubt, but now I had proof positive, it had been him.

I was headed straight to Ranger's apartment, but as I looked through the glass door into the lobby I noticed Huey behind the desk. I detoured and as I swung the door open, Huey looked up and smiled.

"Good morning, ma'am, uh, Stephanie. Happy Easter."

I ignored the ma'am and smiled back. "Good to see you, Huey. How's the leg?"

"It's healing okay," he said. "How's your gunshot wound healing?"

"It's healing great," I said. I lifted my hair away from my neck and leaned forward so he could see. "It's like I have a hickey permanently tattooed on my neck, but I'm told the scar will fade."

"Gee, Stephanie, I'm sorry."

"It's okay," I said with a smile that was sincere. "It wasn't your fault. I'm happy to hear there were no lasting effects from your gunshot wound."

"I'll be fine, eventually," he said. "I'm on desk duty for a while though. That's why Ranger's been taking my shifts lately. He just came in, do you want me to call him and tell him you're here?"

"No, that's okay," I told Huey. "We went to church together." We did, sort of. It wasn't exactly a lie. "He's expecting me." He wasn't but now that I was on Ranger's turf my resolve to confront him was weakening. Maybe if I took him by surprise, it would even my odds. "I just stopped on my way up to see how you were doing. I'm glad you're getting better." I turned and walked out the door and across the garage to the elevator that would take me to Ranger.

I fobbed my way into the elevator and into Ranger's apartment. He must have been in the middle of changing his clothes when he heard the door open, because as I walked from the foyer into the living room he was standing in his bedroom doorway, his shirt untucked, unbuttoned and hanging open. He showed no surprise at my unexpected visit. He'd seen me in church, so maybe my visit wasn't unexpected.

"Babe." The word hung in the air. I couldn't interpret it. Was it a "What are you doing in my space uninvited?" or a "You look great," or something else entirely? I was losing my nerve as I stood and stared at him. His chest was beckoning and I wanted to step close and run my hands over the contours of his bare abdomen, over the ridges and up—that probably wouldn't be appropriate. He was beautiful, and I wanted him to be mine. I wanted to be able to walk across the room and wrap my arms around him. Lay my head on his shoulder and meld back into his life, physically and emotionally. But I couldn't.

There was something between us, and even though I couldn't see it, Ranger's force field was real, keeping me completely immobile. I sucked in a deep breath and a flood of words came out on the exhale.

"Ranger, we need to talk. Where have you been? I saw you in church. What's going on with you—us? I mean, what did I do? How could you leave me alone after…?" After what? After the night of the most incredible lovemaking I've ever shared? After the night I thought my life had begun. With horror I felt the tears pool in the corner of my eyes and spill over. I wiped them away and twisted my hands together as I struggled to find the words I really wanted to say. My eyes focused on the marble floor of the foyer as I realized I'd set a new record. I'd made a complete fool of myself in under thirty seconds.

I hurried across the room and collapsed on the sofa because my legs were shaking. I kicked off my shoes and curled my legs under me as I wrapped my arms around myself. I'd invaded his space and turned into a blubbering fool and the only way to make it better was to jump to my feet and run from the apartment, but I couldn't go. The invisible force field that was keeping me from Ranger was keeping me from leaving the apartment. I was trapped. I couldn't stay, but I couldn't go. With a shock I realized I'd summed up my whole relationship with Ranger. I couldn't have him, but I couldn't give him up.

I felt Ranger's fingers on my hair and opened my eyes to see he'd come to sit next to me. He gently moved my hair back and looked at my fading gunshot scar.

"I saw you at church, too, Babe," he said with complete normalcy, as if he hadn't noticed the blubbering idiot performance I'd just given. "You don't usually go to Mass at the Cathedral."

"I don't usually go to Mass," I replied, striving to match his calmness. "I don't know for sure why I went today, but I needed to think some things through and it seemed like a good idea to go. I chose the Cathedral to avoid Mom and Grandma."

I kept my eyes down and away from his gaze. I saw that he was barefoot. My earlier supposition was right. He'd been changing out of his dress clothes. He had perfect man feet, with straight toes and high arches. The smooth bones of his ankles showed partially under the edge of his slacks. I was overcome with such longing to reach out and stroke the tops of his feet. I'd done it before. On the last night we were together there wasn't a part of his body I hadn't touched. A wave a pain came over me and I knew that foolish or not I had to push the issue. I had to find out what was not happening between us.

"I'm sorry, Ranger. I should have called." I let my eyes roam from his feet, up past his unbuttoned shirt and briefly met his gaze before I snapped my eyes shut. "I need to talk. I have things to tell you and questions to ask, but I can see I've caught you at a bad time."

"It's all right," he said. "It's not a bad time. I worked back-to-back shifts yesterday so a couple of my men could go home and spend the Easter weekend with their families. When I came off duty this morning I showered, dressed and went to Mass. The only thing I'd planned to do today was... sleep." There was just the slightest hesitation in his voice before he'd said sleep. I looked and, yep, it was there. The unspoken, but clearly offered invitation. I could sleep with him. I ignored it.

"Huey said you'd been covering his shifts because of his leg," I said.

Ranger reached out and let his fingers trail along my neck. I shivered and it didn't go unnoticed by either of us. "What's wrong, Babe?"

What's wrong? Where did I begin. I wanted to fast rewind, back to the time when Ranger was my mentor, when our attraction was new and when Ranger was the unknown lover of my fantasies. I wanted a do over. I wanted a chance to avoid the place we were now, because I had no idea where we were now. I summoned my courage and went someplace I'd never been before, to the land of total honesty. I was pretty sure if I was completely honest with Ranger, he'd be honest with me.

"Do you remember when we made lo … slept together the first time?" I asked. "The time when we made the deal about Eddie DeChooch and then you told me to repair my relationship with Joe."

Ranger's face was completely blank. I couldn't read a thing. I didn't know if my question had surprised him or not, but he gave a nod that he did remember.

"I needed some clarification after that," I continued. "I'm not built the same way you are, Ranger. I needed to know what my place in your life was and you told me. You told me I had no place in your life and to go back to Joe. And for once I followed orders. I went back to Joe."

"Are you telling me you and Morelli are back together?" Ranger asked.

"No! I'm just trying to make you understand where I am right now. I think we're back at the same place. We shared something amazing the night after I was shot." I searched his face looking for his agreement to what I'd said. "And then you left."

"And this time you turned to Nikomedes Mattas," he said, his voice curiously flat. "You'd have done better with Morelli."

"Morelli and I are history. I don't need or want Joe Morelli. Why are you bringing him into this conversation?"

"I saw Morelli the night you were shot. He needs and wants you. He's still in love with you."

"Ranger!" I stood and stamped my foot. "We are not talking about Morelli. We are talking about you and me."

"We're talking about your need for a commitment. Morelli can make that commitment. I can't. Not now, maybe never." Ranger reached a hand up to massage the back of his neck. I was giving him a headache. I didn't care.

"Niko wants to sleep with me." There, I'd said it.

"Niko wants you, but not for the reasons you assume."

"I'm considering taking him as a lover." I was pretty sure I wasn't considering it. Just being in the same space with Ranger made me remember what there had been between us. I didn't want Niko. I wanted Ranger.

"If you do that, I'll have to kill him, and it would be inconvenient for me if he was to die now."

My mouth dropped open. Inconvenient? Ranger would kill him. That was not an idle threat. He'd killed for me before. Niko wasn't exactly the crème of Trenton society, but I couldn't be the cause of his death.

"Then why are you avoiding me?" I asked. "I believe you when you say you'll kill Niko if we share a bed. If I'm that important to you why aren't you in my bed. Am I not to have anyone? You don't need me. You don't want me, and yet you don't want anyone else to have me."

"I don't want Niko to have you," he clarified. "Niko has an agenda which you know nothing about."

I moved to the club chair and sat in it. "Then tell me, Ranger. Tell me what the hell is going on." To my surprise, he did.

"From the beginning I told you I was an opportunist. I wasn't born that way, Babe. Things happened to me that changed the course of my life. Eduardo Vera was one of those things. I was working for the government, but on a mission where they would never acknowledge me if something went wrong. Something went very wrong." Ranger stopped talking for a moment. The tightness of his lips and the unfocused look in his eyes lasted only a short time, but it was long enough for me to see he was recalling things he'd rather not.

"By the time I was able to get free," he continued, "my chance for a normal life had disappeared. I had destroyed a billion-dollar connection carefully laid in place by La Muerte Blanca, but I didn't destroy him."

"And now he's in Trenton?" I asked.

"No. He's in Colombia. Coming to Trenton was an indication of how hard he is trying to rebuild his empire. He takes a huge risk every time he leaves his compound. I should have fucking shot him that night in Radius, but I've built a good business and many depend on me. I couldn't risk losing everything."

"And Niko is involved?"

"He is completely involved. He plans to be Vera's stateside connection. With his arms dealings and Vera's drug cartel, they'd be an unstoppable force."

"Shades of Homer Ramos," I murmured.

"Not exactly," Ranger said. "This connection has the possibility of succeeding. Niko lied to me, but I knew that going in. He said he needed me to put eyes on Vera, because I was the only one who could recognize him. That was true enough, but instead of wanting to stop Vera, Niko wants to conquer Vera. Niko wants to be the dominant partner. I did need you for insurance that night, Babe, because of Elaina, but also because I knew if you were with me I wouldn't lose my head and execute Vera."

Ranger lose his head? His control was legendary. He was making it sound as though he'd been on a short fuse. That was something for consideration.

"After that night, I contacted some people I know. I'm sanctioned to take out Vera and take down his entire operation. It's complicated, dangerous, and has a low percentage of succeeding. But I have to do it. Potentially, I could lose everything, or I could finally have the peace of knowing my worst enemy is dead."

"So you are avoiding me to keep me safe?"

"Yes." He was quiet for a moment and his eyes took in my face. He amended his statement. "That's part of the reason. But don't think of me as some avenging do-gooder. I'm not Batman, Babe." I flushed as I remembered how often Lula and I called him Batman.

"Killing Vera and shutting down the operation might change everything, or it might change nothing," he continued. "I've said from the beginning; I'll be in your bed as long as you let me. I do need you, Babe. And God knows I want you," he ran his hand through his hair, "but I can only take what you'll give. Because, at least right now, I can give you nothing."

I sat there thinking about what I'd heard, and Ranger sat there staring at me with a totally unreadable expression. Ranger had never lied to me. With the exception of the night I'd been shot he'd never showed any real emotion. That night was the exception that allowed me to hope. Twice today he'd used qualifiers. He'd said he couldn't commit, not now. Oh yeah, he'd said maybe never, but he'd started out saying not now. And he'd said he couldn't give me anything, at least right now. Those two phrases were the stuff of my midnight fantasies. Someday my prince will come.

Ranger ran his hands through his hair which was longer than he'd been wearing it lately. He looked tired. As if he'd read my thoughts he said, "Babe, I need to go to bed. I've been up thirty-six hours straight and I'm scheduled to take another shift tonight. As I said, I let men go home for the holiday weekend and I'm picking up the slack."

"Do you want me to leave?" I asked.

"No."

I stood and reclaimed the navy and white spectator pumps I'd kicked off earlier. I let them dangle from my fingertips until I made my decision and then I let them drop back to the floor. As I reached behind my back to work the zipper down Ranger came to assist. I felt the dress slide off my shoulders and down my arms and puddle at my feet. His fingers threaded through my hair and he pulled me close to him. The kiss started strong and got stronger. His tongue was in my mouth and I returned in kind, reveling in the hot molten shards of desire that shot through me. His hands left my hair and he was getting ready to lift me into his arms when I stiffened slightly. I needed more words.

"Babe?"

"You said you'd take what I'd give. I'm giving you me. I won't sleep with Niko. I don't want to be responsible for his death, even if he is a crook. I'm giving you me, and I'm not asking for anything. I'm going to learn to be an opportunist, too."

We made it to the bed, eventually. It was hot, rough and fast. He'd said he was tired but he didn't act it. Our lovemaking must have depleted his hidden stores of energy though, because afterwards, he slept deeply as I watched him.

I reran our conversation in my mind. He hadn't said we were exclusive, but I hoped we were. I'd make sure Niko knew there would be nothing physical between us. He also hadn't said he would quit avoiding me, so I prepared myself to see little of him in the near future.

I was going to allow Ranger to use me. To find comfort in my body. I needed more, but he couldn't give it, at least not now. And if I was setting myself up for a situation where he could deeply hurt me, well, I wasn't brave enough to walk away. I'd take whatever was available to me.

I ran a forefinger along his jawline and he didn't move. He needed the sleep. I looked at my wristwatch and was amazed to see barely ninety minutes had passed since I left Lula at the church. If I hurried, I could still make it to my parents for dessert. Stephanie Plum, equal opportunist.


	4. Chapter 4

Thanks again to jago-ji for her beta skills and honest opinions. I don't own these characters, but I like to play with them!

Promises, Promises …

Grandma Mazur was frowning as she rummaged through the bundle of flowers in the basket she held on her arm. She picked out a garish plastic spray of purple and pink tulips and held them toward me.

"Are you sure?" I asked. "They're pretty ugly."

"That's why I picked them," she said. "I never liked Stanley. He was a cheater and he might have been an abuser, too. I never understood why my sister, Violet, stayed with him."

I took the flowers and pulled the screwdriver from the back pocket of my jeans. The ground was soft in front of Great-Uncle Stanley's grave, and I made quick work of poking a hole in the soil. I shoved the plastic stem in deep and stood back to admire my handiwork. The flowers were a little off center, but Stanley wouldn't be complaining.

"If you didn't like him why are you decorating his grave?" I asked.

"Because I promised. I promised my mother I would make sure all the graves were decorated. It's why I come every year. I don't like hanging out here, but I gave my word, and when you do that, you have to keep your word."

"You don't like coming to the cemetery?" I asked. I was surprised. "I thought you enjoyed it. You do it with Mom every year."

"No. I don't like to do it at all. And neither does your mother. I know she told you she sprained her ankle and asked you to come with me. I didn't say anything, because I like spending time with you, but I don't think her ankle's sprained at all. It wasn't even swollen. I think she just wanted to see if Nikki and Victor were getting back together today."

"Nikki and Victor?"

"On the Young & the Restless. It's the big Memorial Day special show today and she thinks Nikki and Victor are going to get it on." Grandma paused as she rummaged around in the flower basket. She pulled an embroidered handkerchief out of its depths and wiped her brow. The day was heating up.

"I wouldn't mind getting it on with Victor," she continued. "Now that your parents have an HD TV you can see that Victor has a pretty good package. Not as good as Ranger's, but still …" I saw a faraway look in her eyes as her conversation drifted off, and I knew better than to question her on her thoughts. I remembered the day Grandma had seen Ranger naked. I knew there would be questions eventually, and I was determined not to answer them.

"Who's next?" I asked, trying to bring her attention back to the job at hand.

"Your Uncle Sandor," she said, snapping back into flower-searching mode. "I've got something special for him." She held out a spray of silk roses and I turned to do my planting duty.

"I'm still a little shocked that you don't like doing this," I told her. "All these years I thought you and Mom really enjoyed it."

"The cemetery is no place to hang out. But I made a promise and now I'm going to ask you to make one."

"Uh … okay." I hesitated. I was pretty sure I was about to sign away my Memorial Days for the rest of my life. Grandma was getting kind of old to be tramping around a cemetery. I guess I was next in line. Maybe I could get Val to help.

"I want you to promise to never come put flowers on my grave."

"What!"

"I mean it. When I'm gone and you miss me, I want you to mix yourself a nice highball and sit back and remember some good times with me, but don't waste your time hanging out here. I don't plan on sticking around here after I die, so I don't see why you should visit me here."

I was intrigued. "Where are you going to hang out?"

"I don't know, for sure," she said. "You have to promise me something else. I need to have an open coffin, no matter what. I'm planning on haunting someplace, and I want to make sure my spirit can get right out. Maybe I'll haunt the PNA hall, or maybe your parents' house, or maybe..." I heard the excitement in her voice. "Maybe I'll haunt Angie Morelli's house and scare the pants off Bella. It sounds like more fun haunting places than it does just laying in the cold ground."

"I guess it does," I said. It should have been creepy to consider, but for some reason it was kind of fun to imagine the ghost of Grandma chasing Bella around Joe's mom's house. "I don't like to think of you being dead, though."

"Yeah, I don't like to think of it either, but I should last a while longer. I've still got plenty of zip left in me, and I live a pretty calm life. Not a dangerous one like you do. Maybe you need to think about what places you're going to haunt when you're gone."

"I don't live such a dangerous life either," I told her. My hand unconsciously went to the still fresh scar on my neck and felt the steady pulse of the artery beneath the healing wound.

"I guess you don't," she agreed. "Especially since Ranger looks out for you."

Ranger did look out for me. It was true I hadn't seen much of him lately, but I sensed his presence, and I had called him a couple of times to help with skips. He'd been unavailable, but he'd sent someone each time, and I managed to send them back in one piece. No more incidents like the one with Mick Barnes.

"All done here," Grandma announced. "Now we need to move on to the earlier generation." I groaned a little at the realization we were probably going to use all the flowers Grandma had in her basket.

As we made our way to the older section of the cemetery I noticed a large black car that seemed to be keeping pace with us. Grandma and I were on foot, having left Uncle Sandor's Buick just inside the gate, but as we progressed through the cemetery the car seemed to be always on the periphery of my field of vision. I wondered for a moment if it was a RangeMan vehicle, but dismissed the idea quickly. Despite the color, it didn't look like a RangeMan fleet vehicle. We were in a cemetery so seeing a black car wasn't too unusual. And the cemetery was crowded with others making their way to graves of departed family. It was Decoration Day, after all.

We kept focused on our task as the day grew warmer. A few more graves and I could drop Grandma off and get ready for what I hoped would be an exciting evening. Ranger had called earlier and asked if I would come to his apartment this evening for dinner. He said he needed to talk with me and reminded me that he still owed me an Italian dinner from his Valentine's Day promise. I was hoping he was going to tell me that the secretive op he had going on regarding La Muerte Blanca was a done deal. He'd made no promises, but I hoped things would change between us when the door was closed on that problem.

"Just one more grave," Grandma said twenty minutes later, "and then there's a nice Entenmann's crumb cake waiting for us at home. I saved my aunt Mary's grave for last. She was a pip. I always tried to be like her."

"I don't remember Aunt Mary."

"I don't remember her either. She died young, but I heard lots about her. She was a flapper, and a gangster's moll, but she was really an undercover operator. She worked for Eliot Ness." Grandma stopped and looked sideways at me. "Maybe that's where you get it from." I didn't ask what "it" was, but the quality and size of the spray of silk flowers I anchored in the ground gave a clue as to the high regard Grandma held her in. As I stood I brushed an unruly spring of curls off my forehead.

I was happy to see the basket was empty. I didn't mind, too much, helping Grandma out, but I needed some time to ready myself for later. Exfoliation was high on my priority list. A shiver of excitement at the thought of an evening with Ranger ran through me. Grandma noticed.

"Ghost walk over your grave?" she asked. I didn't answer.

"Are you coming in for cake?" Grandma asked as we pulled up in front of my parents' house.

"Sure," I said. "I can't stay too long though. I've got …work… to do later on."

"What kind of work?"

"I'm meeting with Ranger," I said. "He has some business to discuss with me."

"That sounds like the best kind of work," Grandma said. "I'd like to have Ranger discuss business with me, sometime." She tapped the old-fashioned dial clock on the dashboard. "Is this the right time?"

"Yes."

"Good, then maybe if we hurry, we can catch the last part of the Young & the Restless. We can check out Victor and you can see how his package compares to Ranger's."

0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0

I stood sideways and looked into the mirror on my bathroom door. I sucked in my stomach as much as I could and exhaled in disgust. I should have stopped with one piece of the Entenmann's. I went back into my bedroom and pulled off the red sheath dress. I hadn't been sure it was the right thing to wear anyway. What did one wear to a visit with Ranger, that included dinner, and I wasn't sure what was for dessert?

I settled on casual. I wore jeans and a nice clingy blue shirt that was cut low enough to show some cleavage and long enough to cover the evidence of my extra Entenmann's. I was sliding my feet into sandals and admiring the fresh coat of red polish on my toes when there was a knock at my door. I frowned as I realized I'd have to get rid of whomever it was quickly. I wasn't running late, but I had no time to spare. I pulled the door open and couldn't prevent my mouth from gaping.

"Hello, Stephanie. Long time, no see." Jeanne Ellen Burrows stood in the middle of my doorway, dressed completely in body-hugging black spandex.

"Uh, yeah," I said, so surprised I struggled to get the words out.

"Are you ready?"

"Ready?"

"Yes. Ready to go to RangeMan."

"Oh, well, I'll just drive myself, but it's nice of you to have come by." That was a lie. What the heck was going on? Ranger had promised me dinner along with conversation, but he hadn't promised me we'd eat alone. Surely, she wasn't joining us for dinner.

"I bumped into Ranger earlier today," she said. "He knew I had plans to be at RangeMan this evening and he asked me to stop by here and bring you with me. I told him I would. It's hard to say no to that man, but you know that." Her mouth curled into what could only be described as a smirk.

Ranger asked her to pick me up. That was going to require some thinking, so instead of continuing what was probably a pointless conversation, I picked up my purse, and locked the door behind me. Normally, it took ten minutes to get to RangeMan. Jeanne Ellen should have used her GPS because the round-about route she chose took us twenty, but I didn't correct her. I wasn't sure what was going on and I didn't want to advertise my ignorance.

When we finally pulled into the RangeMan garage, I wasted no time in exiting her vehicle. Jeanne Ellen pointed toward the elevator. "Ranger said he'd be in his apartment by the time we got here," she told me. "You can have the guy at the desk call and tell Ranger you're here."

"No problem," I said, smiling as sweetly as I could. I pulled out my fob. "I've got the magic key. I'll be fine on my own." I saw her eyes widen slightly. _Take that, you catwoman wannabe_.

"Okay, well, nice seeing you again," she said. She turned and headed for the stairs. I wondered if her destination was the control room. Maybe she was working for RangeMan. That would explain the black clothing.

I wondered about it all the way up to the seventh floor. Jeanne Ellen and Ranger had known each other for a long time, professionally and personally. At one point I was sure they done more than work together. I'd never asked Ranger straight out, partly because his past was none of my business, and mainly because I was afraid, in equal parts, of what he would or wouldn't tell me. I didn't like Jeanne Ellen, and not just because I was jealous of her job skills. She had a way of making me feel superfluous, not unlike the way Tank made me feel. Nothing was ever said, but I got her vibe. She thought she was superior to me.

As the door in front of me opened and Ranger pulled me across the threshold and into his arms, I forgot about Jeanne Ellen and everything else but the sensual promise in his dark eyes.

It started with the touch of his lips to mine. I vaguely heard the sound of my purse hitting the foyer floor, and I felt the whoosh of air from the door closing behind me, but my attention was on Ranger. His kiss, his scent, the touch of his hands on my body as he pulled me into his embrace, melted me. It was at once familiar, and foreign. I hadn't seen him since Easter, but feeling his body against mine, it was as if we'd never been apart. Inexplicably, I became aware of tears running down my face. Ranger must have become aware of them also, because he pulled back and looked into my eyes.

"Babe?"

I sniffed and tried to turn away, embarrassed by the unexpected water works. He wouldn't let me. Instead he kissed the path of my tears down my cheeks until his lips once again reached my mouth. Oh, great, Ranger in gentle mode. I was a complete goner and completely in love with this man. Until this point, my self-avowed opportunist mode had never had a chance to get off the ground, but I was going to take full advantage of what I could feel him offering. I pushed my body forward against his hardness, and slid my hands up under his shirt.

I let my fingers slide over his chiseled abdomen and toward his nipples which I knew from previous experience would awaken the beast. My hands stilled before they reached their goal. I pulled away from him and raised his shirt to verify with my eyes, what I'd felt with my fingertips. He'd lost weight, a lot of it. His abdominal muscles were sharply defined, but I could see his ribs beneath skin that was warm under my hands. I let my eyes travel down his body and, reeling, I pulled farther away to better look at this new version of Ranger. He took advantage of the space and pulled his shirt up over his head and let it drop to the floor. And when his hands skimmed the hem of my shirt and started sliding it up, I grasped his arm as my entire body stiffened.

"Babe?"

"Ranger!" How I managed to utter his name through the sudden tightening of my throat was a mystery. My hand slowly turned his noticeably thinner arm outward. The evidence was there but I didn't believe what I was seeing. Needle tracks. His eyes followed mine and when he realized the cause of my distress he spoke softly.

"It's not what you're thinking."

"You can't know what I'm thinking," I said. "I don't know what I'm thinking."

"They _are_ needle tracks, Babe. But not from drugs. Not street drugs in any case."

"Oh!" I cried. "You're ill!" Again my tears began to fall. He pulled me into his arms and held me tight. His weight loss hadn't affected his strength, because I couldn't move out of his embrace, even though I tried. I wriggled ineffectively, trying to break free.

"Be still," he said. "I'm not sick, and I'm not mainlining. This is a disguise, and this is what I need to talk with you about."

"A-a-disguise?" I couldn't help the stammer.

He let go of me and bent to pick up his shirt. I watched as he pulled it back on, the long sleeves covering the sores on his arm. I let him take my hand and lead me down the hall into his kitchen.

"Let's eat first, and then I'll explain. We have a lot to talk about." That was a first—Ranger saying we would be talking a lot. We had never talked a lot. But even the thought of getting some straight answers out of him couldn't take my mind off his appearance.

I wasn't a good judge of weight, so I had no idea how much Ranger normally weighed, but he had lost enough that the skin beneath his cheekbones had sunken in giving him a fierce and edgy look. On close inspection there were the beginnings of dark circles under his eyes. His black shirt covered his arms to the wrist and obscured what I'd seen, but I didn't need a second look. Both arms had been covered with needle tracks, some of them looking angry and inflamed.

I must have looked as devastated as I felt because he moved into me again and pulled me close against him. He spoke softly in my ear. "It wasn't my intention to surprise you with this. I'd planned to tell you, but the fact that you reacted as you did tells me I've done a good job in preparing for what I'm about to do. This is a disguise of sorts, and the look on your face lets me know it's a believable one. I'm not sick, Babe."

Ranger pulled back the chair and I sat wordlessly while he opened the oven and brought out a tray containing two plates covered with domed covers. I recognized the touch of Ella and said nothing as he positioned the plates, one in front of me and one across from me. He didn't sit though, instead he moved to the counter where there were two glasses and an uncorked bottle of red wine. He poured a glass of the wine and set it in front of me. He filled the other glass with water from a filtered pitcher and brought it to the table.

He sat and then looked across at me as he simultaneously removed both covers. My plate was covered with a generous portion of veal scallopini, pasta and Italian green beans. "This is Ella's version of Italian," Ranger told me. I looked at his uncovered plate to see a small grilled chicken breast, without sauce of any kind and a generous serving of green beans. I stared pointedly at his plate.

"Italian is not on my diet right now, but there is plenty for you, and Ella has left dessert for you in the fridge."

I pushed my plate away, but I did take a big gulp of what I'm sure was an excellent wine. I didn't taste it. "What the hell is going on, Ranger?"

"Eat and I'll tell you."

I didn't feel like eating, but I heard something in Ranger's voice that made me acquiesce, so I took a bite.

"I'm leaving early tomorrow, or later tonight, depending on how you look at it. I'm going deep undercover and I need to look the part I'll be playing."

"An emaciated junkie?" I asked.

"A desperate man, with a drug habit," he replied. "Bobby gave me a solution that irritates the skin as the needle goes in, but is basically just saline. I need to realistically look like a mainliner for my cover."

"What do you mean, you're going undercover? You're not a cop. Cops go undercover. Joe goes undercover. You don't."

"I do. I've made several previous trips to set this one up. I'm going undercover in Colombia. I've worked my way into Eduardo Vera's cartel." Ranger stopped talking and calmly cut into his chicken, took a bite and seemed to savor it. He must have starved himself to lose so much weight in such a short period of time.

"I'll be living and working with his men," he continued, "until I get the information I need to bring the organization down. When that happens, he will be assassinated and I will come home."

"You're going to kill him?" I asked.

"Presently, it's not the plan for me to kill him, but I will make it possible for that scenario to happen. Or I will do it, if need be."

"But I thought he knew you. He'll recognize you. It doesn't sound like a good plan to me." I was furiously folding and unfolding a cloth napkin in my lap. The food had been forgotten.

"It's a very carefully thought out plan. All the groundwork has been laid, and now it's time to move forward. I can't share all the details with you, but I wanted you to know I was going. And I need to get a promise from you before I go."

I immediately thought of Grandma Mazur and my promise earlier in the day to not hang around her grave. I had the illogical thought Ranger was going to ask the same thing of me.

"This is dangerous, this undercover thing you're getting ready to do." It wasn't a question. I knew what the answer would be.

"Potentially, yes. There are safeguards that have been put into place. I can't go into detail, Babe, but there is one man who can do this job, and it's me. I have to move on Vera now."

I took another drink of wine. "What promise?" I asked.

"Later. First tell me what your relationship with Niko is like these days."

I raised an eyebrow. "Niko? I have no relationship with Niko. I told him after … after Easter that I'd decided to pull back from seeing him."

"And his response?"

I stared at Ranger for a few moments before I answered. The slenderness of his face was unnerving and I felt as though I was talking to a stranger. He must have sensed my unease because his hand moved quickly to grasp mine and his fingers began a soft exploration of my palm. My body reacted with an electric current that wasn't restricted just to my palm. It was still Ranger all right. He might look different, but he was still magic.

"He asked if it was because I was involved with you. I told him no. He told me I was a bad liar and that he was a patient man and could wait till the time was right. And I haven't seen him since. It was almost embarrassing how easily he gave up his pursuit of me."

"Niko didn't back off completely," Ranger said. "He's been having you surveilled almost continuously. Have you been unaware of that?"

I remembered the black car at the cemetery. Other than that I hadn't noticed a thing, but I wasn't telling Ranger. "I've seen someone from time to time," I said. "Today at the cemetery with Grandma there was a black car. I didn't think it was RangeMan."

"RangeMan was there, too, Babe." I pulled my hand from his and stood from the table and turned my back to him. He didn't move.

"Am I in danger then, I mean, more than usual?" Again I remembered this morning's conversation with Grandma Mazur. My life was safer because of Ranger. I found the idea of a life in which RangeMan was my constant guardian angel unsettling. I wanted a life where I was Ranger's partner, not where I was his obligation.

"Stephanie." I turned back to him at his use of my name. "This is different. I'm getting ready to destroy not only the empire of La Muerte Blanca, but possibly this will bring down the Ramos empire as well. Niko set this in action. He had hoped to use me to help him gain power over Vera. If he realizes the plan is to destroy Vera, he'll try to stop me any way he can."

"You mean by coming after me?"

"Yes, because he thinks you are important to me."

"Well, he's wrong. I can count on one hand the times I've seen you in the last six months. I'm hardly central in your world!" I don't know what kind of response I was expecting, but I got none. I searched his face for some emotion. It was blank. _Ranger looks out for you_. My grandma's words came back with a rush, and I felt suddenly ashamed. Of course he cared for me. I knew it.

"Ranger, I'm sorry."

"You've heard the expression, let sleeping dogs lie?" he asked me, ignoring my apology. I nodded, not sure how this related to our discussion. "That's what I've been doing. I can't ignore my past any longer if I'm to have a future." There was silence in the apartment for a full minute. I sat thinking about everything I'd heard and Ranger sat immobile, his eyes never leaving me. The words, when they came were softly spoken, but clear.

"I want a future," he said. "With you."

I think I stopped breathing for a moment. I'd wanted to hear those words for so long that when he said them I was, at first, unbelieving. I had to hear them again.

"You want a future with me?"

"I do." He stood and came to me with his hand held out. I took it and stood to be immediately swept into a tight embrace. I buried my face in his chest and, when he spoke, his words ruffled my hair. "When I broke free of Vera I swore I'd never go back. It was the deciding factor when I left government work and established RangeMan. I can't ignore the sleeping dog any longer. I have to go back, before we can move forward."

"And you're leaving tonight," I said. "When will you be back?" Ranger disengaged from me and walked to his foyer. He picked something up off the console table and handed it to me. It was a wedding invitation. I read the invitation and then looked questioningly at him.

"It's the couple from the Radius. Cathy and Tim," he said.

"I never knew her name," I said. I remembered I'd called her Chatty Cathy though and felt a momentary pang at my thoughtlessness. Since I'd heard she would be okay I hadn't given the couple much thought at all. My thoughts had been centered on me and Ranger, and where we were going, or not going.

"I paid her hospital bill," Ranger said. "I think the invitation is their thank you. Do you see the date?"

"July 4th," I said.

"I've RSVP'd for us," Ranger said. "They're starting their married life on Independence Day. I'll be back by then, and we'll attend their wedding. It will be our independence from my past. Our beginning."

"Ranger … I…" I stopped because I didn't really know what to say. Everything I have wanted was suddenly being placed before me.

"Say you'll attend with me, Stephanie."

"I will."

"If things go as expected I will be back in the States and through with my debriefing and home in time for this wedding. You may not see me until then, but I'll be there."

"Promise?"

"I promise. Nothing short of death will keep me from being there."

I shivered. "Don't say that."

"I'll be there, Babe. I've promised. Now I need your promise. Come on, let's sit."

Our dinner was forgotten as I followed Ranger to his sofa and let him pull me down next to him.

"Niko Mattas must be convinced there is nothing between you and me. You will, of course have RangeMan protection while I'm gone, but it will be discreet. There will always be an operative at your disposal, and you will be tracked. My man won't be dressed in RangeMan black, but he'll be there for you. I want Niko to see no evidence of this connection. That's why I've stayed away from you. He suspects more than knows the level of our involvement. Promise me you'll accept my help with this and try to convince Mattas we are nothing to one another."

I knew my promise would enable Ranger to do his job better. He wouldn't have to worry about me. I'd be the poster child for behaving well. The RangeMan operative, probably Tank in Ranger's absence, would have no problems with me.

"I promise," I said. "So you've picked out someone to be my bodyguard whose appearance won't give away his RangeMan connection?" _Or her RangeMan connection_. Oh shit, I was starting to understand why Jeanne Ellen had picked me up earlier.

"Yes," he said.

I pulled away from him and got to my feet. I paced the room a couple of times before I turned back to him. "You could have asked me," I said. "I want to cooperate. I want to be safe, and I want you to be able to go and not worry about me back here, but Ranger, she doesn't like me—and I'm not wild about her."

"Babe?"

"Jeanne Ellen. Why would you choose Jeanne Ellen?"

"I didn't."

"But…" I started, only to be silenced by the 200 watt smile. It went a long way toward erasing the sharpened angles of his face.

"I thought you might be upset when you found out who I've asked to watch over you, but it's not Jeanne Ellen."

"It's not?"

"No. I did ask her to bring you over tonight because I didn't want Niko's men to suspect you were here, and she was coming over anyway. I didn't think your tail would make the connection. Jeanne Ellen took a circuitous route to make sure she wasn't followed, so I think it's safe to say Niko doesn't know you're here."

"What's she doing here?" I asked. "Does she work for you?"

"No." Ranger seemed startled by my question. "I thought you knew," he said. "She and Tank are involved. It's been the nine-day wonder around here. I thought Lula would have told you."

Jeanne Ellen and Tank. I gave a whole body shudder. Lula had never said a word, which in itself was telling. "I didn't know," I said. "I've been pretty much out of the loop around here for a while. At least now I understand why. You're trying to keep away from me to protect me. I think, on some level I should be pissed off, but really—I'm grateful."

Ranger's phone rang. He glanced at the caller ID and then brought the phone to his ear.

"Yo." He listened and then spoke once more. "His timing is impeccable. Send him up." He disconnected and turned to me. "Remember, you're grateful. The person who has agreed to look after you and pose as your lover while I'm away is here. He's on his way up."

"Pose as my lover?" My eyebrows raised. "You said I'd have protection. Not a fake boyfriend."

"If Niko thinks you are in a relationship he is much more likely to believe you have no part in my life."

I thought about it. Ranger was right, but I wasn't at all sure about pretending to be involved with someone. The ramification of that scenario could be far reaching. Especially if my mother got wind I was dating someone new.

There was a knock at the door and Ranger went to answer it. I saw a male hand shake Ranger's. It was attached to a nicely muscled forearm. There was something familiar about that forearm, but before I could figure out what it was the body behind the forearm walked into the room.

Joseph Anthony Morelli. He echoed Jeanne Ellen's words. "Long time, no see, Cupcake."

I was speechless. But only for a moment. "What the fuck! You're sending me back to Morelli again!"

Morelli looked at Ranger. "Why don't I just wait down in the garage?" he asked.

"Good idea," Ranger said. "She won't be long."

"The hell I won't."

Twenty minutes later I jerked the passenger door of Joe's SUV open. The knuckles of my right hand were stinging where I'd punched them into Ranger's still rock hard abdomen. My lips were swollen from a series of semi-orgasmic kisses and my body was pulsing with unspent adrenaline.

"Take me to Pino's," I commanded. "I'm in the mood for Italian."


	5. Chapter 5

**I'm back ;-)** Thank you to everyone who has read and left reviews for this story. After a small detour I am back and should be posting on a regular schedule. Thanks to my beta, jago-ji, who somehow always finds the places where the story doesn't flow smoothly, catches my typos and corrects my grammar. As always, I use them for fun and not for profit.

 **Co-Independence**

Independence Day is such a big holiday that I had to tell its story in two parts. The second part will be forthcoming in the near future, but for now, I give you ...

 **Part 1**

Stephanie Denial Plum. Yep, it was my middle name and also the name of the land where I was currently living. I awoke on the morning of July 4th thinking I was hearing gunshots from the alley behind Joe's house, but soon realized it was an early Independence Day reveler. I hadn't heard a word from Ranger or anyone in the RangeMan camp, but I knew he'd be home today to take me to the wedding. He'd promised.

Ranger had disappeared from Trenton with no fanfare, and Joe had slipped back into my life with an ease that should have been unsettling. Since Memorial Day, I'd been almost living with him, spending as many as four nights a week at his place. There was a practical reason for that. Joe had an extra bedroom, and I was using it.

When we split, Joe and I both knew it was the right decision. I cared for him, and he cared for me, but we'd been trying to make a romantic love out of what had basically been a friends with benefits situation. The benefits had been great, there was no doubt, but when the time came that we realized we both needed more than sex from our relationship it was time to move on.

Moving on. I'd left Joe and waited for Ranger to make his move. Joe had taken a more direct route and jumped back into the Trenton singles scene. He figured the right girl would come along eventually, but until she did, he was going to experience everything that was available to him. He'd been very happy without me. I knew this because my family lives in the Burg, and there are no secrets in the Burg.

My mom had taken our break-up better than I'd expected, because Joe's reemergence as a single man had also turned him into every mother's nightmare. He was still a good cop and a respected citizen, but the Burg was finally able to breath out its collective pent-up _I told you so_. The Morelli genes had surfaced. Joe was a womanizer.

Our current situation had become the topic of waggling tongues all across the Burg. No one knew the truth of the situation. Not my mother, not Connie, or Lula, although I could tell Lula suspected something. I didn't know if Tank knew the truth because I hadn't talked to him. As always, Ranger made it clear that I should go to Tank with any serious problem. I'd have to be discreet due to limiting my connection to all things Ranger. I'd have to be desperate because I was limiting my connection to Jeanne Ellen. I was intimidated by Tank on a normal day. Now that he was allied with Jeanne Ellen, I couldn't imagine a situation where I would go to him for help. I'd go to Joe.

The night I'd left Ranger's apartment with Joe we went to Pino's, ate meatball subs, drank beer and rediscovered our friendship. The rest of our world was assuming we'd picked up where we'd left off, but Morelli and I were enjoying a friendship without benefits … well, not those kinds of benefits at least. There were benefits in being friends with Joe. Bob, for one. I'd missed that crazy dog. And for another, a relationship with a man I trusted in every way except a romantic way. That was past. We'd thrown out the proverbial baby with the bath water when we'd separated. Now, Ranger, of all people, had given us the chance to redefine our relationship and cement its reunion.

Even Grandma was a little concerned about Joe's extracurricular activities. Once she made sure I was aware of and okay with the fact that Joe was seeing other women, she aligned herself with me. Thank God for my grandma. Joe had tried to be more discreet in his alley-catting, in deference to his pretend affair with me. I was okay with that. He was not the ideal candidate for celibacy, and we'd established the very first night that I was not even a mild blip on his radar screen.

I'd asked him why he'd volunteered for Stephanie duty. He'd been truly offended and a little pissed off when I asked him if Ranger was paying him. His response had been succinct, profane, believable and endearing. He loved me. He wasn't in love with me, but he cared about me, my safety and my happiness, and the craziest part was he didn't fucking know why.

The rat-a-tat-tat of illegal fireworks exploding from somewhere behind the house came at the same time as the soft knock on the bedroom door. I rolled over and watched as the door opened slowly and Joe walked in. He was carrying a mug in one hand and a Tasty Pastry bag in the other.

"I brought you breakfast," he said. He walked quietly, almost cautiously, to the edge of the bed. He set the coffee on the bedside table and pulled a Boston Crème from the sack. "Your favorite."

There was something in the tone of his voice, something in the way he moved that set my pulse racing, not because he was offering me caffeine and sugar, but because he was getting ready to deliver bad news. It seemed like my visit to Denial Land was going to come to an abrupt end.

I sat up and pushed my hair back off my face. I looked at Joe for a long time before I reached out and took the donut. He sat on the edge of the bed and watched as I ate, leisurely savoring every little squish of crème. When I was finished I licked my fingers and turned to grab the coffee mug. After two big gulps I set it down. Joe had been patient while I'd stalled, but when the donut was gone and my thirst was sated, I couldn't put it off any longer. It was time to hear the news.

"Go ahead," I said.

"I had a call from Tank early this morning. Ranger missed his last two check-ins. I'm not totally sure what the time frame was. Hell, I don't even know where he is, but Tank had originally expected him home today. And, Cupcake ... Tank is concerned."

"Of course he's concerned," I said. My voice sounded calm and reasonable and disguised the sudden double-time beating of my heart. "Ranger made a promise to me that he would be home and done with all his extra-curricular work. Today was supposed to be the first day of the rest of our lives." I cringed when I heard the banal words come from my lips.

"Something's wrong, but not with Ranger." I was being logical. I couldn't handle what I was hearing any other way. I had to assume there was a good explanation for Ranger's absence. I had to assume there was a simple, easily fixable problem. He was fine.

"He's just had a failure to … communicate." I heard myself uttering more banality, but I believed what I was saying, because not to believe would mean that Ranger wasn't going to keep his promise.

"Tank asked if I would take you to this wedding tonight," Joe said. "He seems to think it's important, now that Ranger's not back, that you and I be seen together, as a couple."

Now, that Ranger's not back, nothing is important. That was my overriding thought. My calmness departed and was instantly replaced by anger.

"Tank wants us to go to a wedding? Is he crazy? Ranger's missing!" I pushed back the covers and got out of bed. "I'm going to talk to Tank," I said. "It's time for some straight answers. How long has he known about this?" I bent to pick up the jeans I'd carelessly discarded on the floor the night before.

Joe, still sitting on the bed, reached out and hauled me down beside him. "You can't just go see Tank. You're supposed to be done with Ranger. If you go to see Tank you'll undo all the careful plans Ranger made for you to be safe."

"Safe from whom?" I asked. "Niko Mattas? Maybe I'll go see him. He's in this thing up to his eyeballs. He probably knows where Ranger is." I stood up from the bed and Joe stood to restrain me. I twisted and turned to get away, and he pulled to keep me still and somehow we both fell onto the bed. I whooshed out air as he landed on top of me, and we both stilled. This was a position we'd been in many times before, and I thought, maybe, I saw a brief flare of arousal in his eyes, but it was gone before I could be sure.

His knee was between my thighs and his body rested heavily on mine. "Cupcake," he said into my ear. "Hold still." I did. Even though I was waiting for the opportunity to jump and run, I knew better than to wriggle and twist under him.

"Listen to me, before you go off half-cocked and do something you'll regret."

"Okay," I said. "I'll listen, but get off me." He rolled off and laid on his back beside me.

"Ranger asked me to take care of you while he was gone," Joe said. "I told him I would and I'm going to. You can't run to RangeMan and demand an answer from Tank that he probably doesn't have."

"I need to talk to him," I insisted, my voice rising with each sentence. "He knows more than he told you, I'm sure. And I want answers. I've done everything Ranger asked. I've been careful with my skips. When I needed backup I just turned the skip over to RangeMan completely. I've been safe. Niko has probably forgotten about me. I'm fine. But Ranger is missing. I have to find out what Tank knows. I'm going to RangeMan!"

I was righteous in my anger. I _had_ done everything I'd said I'd do. The Burg gossip lines were full of Stephanie and Joe talk. Surely Niko couldn't think I was still involved with Ranger, because the plain and simple truth is I wasn't. I wasn't involved with Joe either, but I'd done my best to make it look like I was.

"Niko hasn't forgotten about you," Joe said. "I've spotted a tail several times when we've been in public. He's just waiting for some proof of connection between you and Ranger. I'm not sure what he'd do if he thought you were involved in Ranger's business, but the goal is to not give him a chance to act." I was quiet as I pondered what Joe had just said. I hadn't seen or sensed anyone following me.

"Tank will be at the wedding tonight," Joe said. "He will find us and talk to us there. He seems to think it's very important that you and I show up there as a couple. Let's do as he asked. Then we can reconsider where we go from here."

That answered one question and brought up another. Tank apparently knew that Joe was in the picture at Ranger's request. But why would Joe and I need to be seen at the wedding? It must have something to do with Niko. Maybe Cathy and Tim, the bride and groom, had invited him as well, although I couldn't imagine that. He hadn't even been in the bar the night of the poisoning.

Where was Ranger? My stomach did a flip-flop and bile rose in my throat. For a moment I thought the Boston Crème might make a reappearance. I breathed slowly and deeply and waited for the nausea to subside. Okay. I'd done everything Ranger asked, so now I'd do what Tank was asking. I'd attend the wedding with Joe, find Tank, and get some answers. And once I had those answers I was going to do everything in my power to find out why Ranger was MIA.

I'd only looked at the wedding invitation once, and that was the last time I saw Ranger, but Morelli had been briefed by Tank as to the time and location, so I didn't concern myself with any of the details, other than I had to be ready by six in the evening. Apparently, it was to be a lavish outdoor affair. I hoped that whatever purpose was being served by attending with Joe was worth it. I didn't understand why Tank and Joe were going on with business as usual when Ranger was missing.

I spent the afternoon at my place, alternately worrying about Ranger and then bravely reassuring myself, he was fine. Between the mood shifts I managed to get ready for the wedding and was waiting at the door of my building when Joe pulled into the lot. I opened the car door and slid onto the passenger seat, not waiting for him to do the escort thing and get out and open my door for me. We could look like a couple when we got there, but for now I was all business. If I did as Tank asked, then he'd owe me one, and this was a good time to be in that position.

"You look nice," Joe told me as he handed me a piece of paper.

"Thanks. What's this?" I asked.

"It's the address of the wedding venue. Somewhere in Deal. Put it in the GPS for me."

"In Deal?" I was surprised. I looked at the address Joe had scribbled on the back of an envelope and my hand fisted around it. "I know this address, Joe, and I know exactly how to get there."

"Is it some fancy wedding hall?" he asked.

"Hardly," I said, recalling the house in my mind. "It's a big, pink, Mediterranean style McMansion that sits on the beach. Alexander Ramos' house."

"Alexander Ramos is dead," Joe said.

"Yeah, he is," I agreed. "But his business is alive and well and being run by his cousin, Nikomedes Mattas. And isn't it a coincidence that the wedding is being held at that house."

"Guess now we know why Tank wanted us to be there," Joe said.

"I'm going get some answers from Tank tonight," I told Joe. "I'll play the part of your loving girlfriend, but at some point I'm going to find Tank."

"How about I look for Tank?" Joe asked. "If Niko Mattas is there it might seem less suspicious if I talked to Tank."

"Fine," I said. There was no sense in talking about strategy with Joe. Ranger was missing, and I was going to be brought up to date on the intel and for once, be completely in the loop, no matter which one of us made first contact with Tank.

I could only guess as to why Cathy and Tim were being married at the Ramos family complex. It had been a few years since I'd met Alexander Ramos—way back when Ranger and I were still circling one another trying to figure out what to do about the attraction that was growing between us. I remembered that time well. I used to let myself wonder, late at night, what kind of a lover Ranger would be. Now I knew, and the reality exceeded all of my imaginings. The thought that he might be injured, or worse, sent me into a near panic attack.

Joe's hand slid across the console. As his fingers interlaced with mine I felt a rush of gratitude for his friendship and understanding. I concentrated on staying in control. I could attend this stupid wedding and show the world I was Joe's lover. I had to do it for Ranger. I was calm as I gave him directions to Alexander's beachside mansion.

It turned out that neither Joe nor I had to look for Tank. The RangeMan presence was noticeable almost immediately. As we pulled into the large circular drive in front of the Ramos mansion a valet was waiting to park our car and next to the valet was Huey. He saw me and nodded, but didn't come forward to talk.

There was a clearly marked walkway through the garden that sided the house to an area decorated for the wedding. On our short walk I saw another of my favorite RangeMen, Howdy. He gave me a wink and brief smile but made no other overture.

"What's going on here?" I asked Joe as we made our way across the petal-strewn path. "There's a definite RangeMan presence here."

"I see that," said Joe. "I'm not sure, but Tank is standing at the far corner of the house. Let me find you a seat, and I'll go have a word with him." I turned and saw Tank taking in the scene. Our gazes met briefly and he gave me an almost imperceptible nod before turning away from me.

"Yeah, you do that," I said. If Tank thought he was going to get away with just a nod, he was mistaken. I was going to have it out with him before the night was over. I would know everything he knew about Ranger's whereabouts. On that point I was certain.

I sat in the white chair on the bride's side and placed my purse on the seat next to me. If all the chairs were filled, it looked like there would be over a hundred guests. Joe and I had arrived fairly early, but there were already quite a few of the seats taken. A shadow fell across me and I looked up to see Niko Mattas smiling down at me. He was wearing a white suit with a black tie. He looked like a younger, hipper version of Mr. Rourke from Fantasy Island, but the look worked for him. This complex was his Fantasy Island in a way I supposed.

"Stephanie, do you mind?" he asked, his gaze traveling to my purse on the chair.

"Well, no," I said, moving my purse so he could sit. "My boyfriend will be back shortly, but you can sit here until he returns."

"Oh," he said. "I didn't realize Carlos was going to make it. I'm looking forward to seeing him."

"No, not Carlos," I said. "Joe. Joe Morelli. I don't know if you know him, but …"

"Oh, yes," Niko interrupted. "I know Detective Morelli. I just wasn't aware he was your boyfriend. I thought you threw me over for Carlos."

"I didn't throw you over, Niko. There never was anything serious between you and me."

"Sadly, my dear, that's true, but enough about my failed seduction. Let's celebrate the fortunate young couple to be married here today. They must think they've won the lottery."

"You mean because your sister poisoned the bride and now out of guilt you've given them your home for their wedding? That doesn't sound like such good luck to me."

Niko laughed. "I love your frankness, Stephanie. Is it my sister then that you hold against me? Is Elaina the reason you put the brakes on our relationship?"

"Niko," I sighed. I looked at the extremely handsome man, who was half taunting, half flirting with me. "There never was a relationship. There was consideration of one, I'll give you that. But Joe came back into my life and he's staying there. We've been together off and on, for a long time. Now we're on for good."

"And all this time I thought you were with Carlos." He was lying. I knew it, but I didn't know why. He knew I had been practically living with Joe, because Joe had seen his people watching me. Unless they had Joe's house bugged, Niko couldn't know we weren't lovers. It made me wonder once again why Ranger was so adamant that Niko think there was nothing between he and I. Niko was fishing for information, and he was using Ranger for bait. Every time he said the word Carlos, he was waiting for me to react. I thought I'd give him a little of his own medicine.

"So where is Ranger?" I asked him. "I see several of his men here. Did Cathy and Tim invite the entire RangeMan staff to this wedding?"

"No," Niko said. "Unfortunately, Carlos is away on business. I assumed you knew. When I saw you, I first thought maybe he'd returned to town and had escorted you here today. I understand, now, that you are with your new man."

"Joe is not my new man, and Carlos never was my man." Both parts of that statement were true. "I've been with Joe, as I said, for some time. You still haven't explained what the RangeMan crew is doing here."

Niko waved his hand as if that was unimportant. "Just a little problem of the beach having public access," he said. "RangeMan is providing security against any wedding crashers. My generosity has limits. I don't mind providing for the guests of the bride and groom, but not for the general public. RangeMan will see to it that the wedding crashers stay away."

Interesting. I wondered how Tank had arranged that, because I was sure the idea had come from RangeMan and not the other way around. "I'm aware that this beach is public access," I told Niko. A little devil inside me was making me play with him. "I used to spy on your cousin, Alexander, from this very beach."

Niko's beautifully arched eyebrows raised in surprise. "You spied on Alexander?"

"Oh, yes," I said, smiling sweetly. "In the beginning, I was too … reticent to approach him. But later on, he would sneak out of his house to spend time with me. He proposed to me, but I said no. I think his sons wouldn't have been in favor of the union." What I'd said was true, but there was no way I'd ever considered marrying Alexander Ramos. He'd been a crazy, and dangerous, old fool. The only reason I'd had anything to do with him at all was to help Ranger prove his innocence of a murder he'd been framed for.

"Now I feel terribly rejected," Niko said. "You refuse to let this mutual attraction we have run its natural course, but you were involved with my cousin, a man who was wrinkled, fickle, and old enough to be your father."

"Old enough to be my grandfather," I corrected.

"You should reconsider me, my dear Stephanie." He reached out and ran his hand down the length of my arm. I felt my skin prickle under the touch of his hand, but it wasn't with arousal. "I'd be a very generous and attentive lover," he continued. His voice was low and sensual, and hadn't carried far. It had carried far enough, though. Unbeknownst to me, Joe had returned.

"I'm sure you would be generous and attentive, Mattas, but you're poaching. Back off. Stephanie is with me and she's likely to stay with me." Joe stood menacingly in front of the chair where I was sitting.

"Forgive me, Detective," Niko said self-deprecatingly. "She's such a lovely woman, I had to try once more. I can see the circumstances will not play out in my favor. If you'll excuse me, I need to see to the other guests." He rose and walked away quickly.

"What was that all about?" Joe asked, as he sat down.

"I'm not sure. I think he was sounding me out. Trying to get me to admit that I knew Ranger was missing. I don't think I gave anything away. And I don't think he's at all fooled by our pretense."

"What pretense?" Joe asked.

I rolled my eyes. "The pretense that we are important to one another."

Joe took both my hands in his and twisted me sideways in my chair so I was facing him. "Cupcake, you are very important to me. Once I accepted that we weren't good couple material, I moved on and so did you." I squirmed a little wishing there was some way I could break into his monologue. I thought I was going to have to hear something I didn't want to hear … about how we should try for real. I remembered that brief flare of arousal when we had fallen on the bed together.

"I care for you, Stephanie, and just because we still find one another attractive…" He held up his hand to stop my protest. "You do," he said dryly. "I've seen you checking out the goods!" I blushed a little. "I can't think of any two people," he continued, "who are better friends than we are. We need to let go of the past and keep what we have. I'm grateful to Ranger, because if he hadn't asked, this wouldn't have happened. I might have gone a lot longer without bringing you back into my life. I want us to stay friends. I know you're in love with Ranger. That's sort of okay. He isn't who I would have picked for you, but he's who you've picked."

"Who would have you picked?" I asked. I was a little uncomfortable with such an outright declaration from Joe and at the same time curious about Joe's idea of my Mr. Right.

"Eddie."

"Eddie—as in Gazarra? You're nuts! He's married to my cousin!"

"Yeah, but he had eyes for you first!"

"You creep!" I said as I punched him in the arm. Joe had given me information that I didn't need about Eddie, but then I realized he'd done something else as well. He'd taken my mind, for a moment, off Ranger, and he'd cemented his place in my life. I leaned over and kissed him full on the lips.

"Thanks, Joe. I love you, too." He smiled at me but didn't say anything further as the music began to play. "Looks like this shindig is getting started," he said.

"Dang! I wanted you to tell me what Tank said."

"Later, Cupcake. Tank will be at my house after the wedding tonight. We'll talk then."

Considering I didn't know the couple other than very superficially, and that my mind was preoccupied with what might be happening to Ranger at that very point in time, I sort of enjoyed the wedding. I thought maybe Niko had a small point about winning the lottery. Cathy hadn't died after all, and that one incident had provided a fabulous wedding. The bride must have realized her good fortune, because she made a beeline to me at the reception.

"Stephanie, I'm so glad you came, but where is Ranger? I wanted to thank him," Cathy gushed. "I mean that guy you're with is hot, but he's not Ranger. Ranger is special. He's sending us to Fiji for our honeymoon. All expenses paid. Isn't that nice?"

"Uh, yes it is," I said. Had Ranger really done that or was that Tank at work again? I knew so little about RangeMan these days, I couldn't decide. I started to explain to Cathy that Joe was my boyfriend, but she'd moved on to another topic of conversation.

"Timmy and I are staying at the reception until the fireworks," she said. "Mr. Mattas arranged a private display for the wedding guests since it is the 4th of July."

"That's great," I said, inwardly groaning. My mother had beat certain rules of etiquette into me and one of them was you never left the reception before the bride and groom. I hoped the fireworks were good. As Cathy walked away to greet another guest I turned to look for Joe. He was talking to an older couple and seemed to be really involved in the conversation so I found my way to a table at the back of the reception area. It had a good view of the dark night sky over the beach and I figured that's where the fireworks would go off. I planned to sit quietly and wait, and then get the heck out of Deal.

I sat through the cake cutting, the first dance, and the garter toss. What next? Joe had moved on from the couple and was now talking to other guests. I knew he was keeping a close eye on me, but trying to work the crowd. I recognized his technique, but I wasn't sure what he was after. Probably trying to gather information on Niko, but these weren't Niko's guests. They were Cathy and Tim's. The DJ interrupted my thoughts as he announced that the fireworks would begin shortly. I tried to catch Joe's attention unsuccessfully. I was just about to get up to go to him when Niko slid into the seat beside me.

"Are you enjoying yourself, Stephanie?"

"Yes," I lied. "It was a lovely wedding. It was kind of you to provide your home for them."

"It's not really my home," Niko said. "It's part of the company's holdings. And I wasn't being kind at all. I was just assuring my continued good standing in the community. I didn't want any negative publicity after the situation at the Radius bar."

"Where do you live, then?" I asked. I wasn't surprised to find out he didn't live in Alexander's old home, but I realized I had no idea if Niko made his home in Trenton.

"I'm glad you asked," he said. The sky lit with a bright flash and then the ground reverberated with a thunderous bang. The fireworks had started. The lights went out as the sky filled with one cascading firework display after another. Niko leaned in. "I'm going to take you to my home. Very soon."

"I don't think so, Niko," I said. "I've told you. I'm not interested." I felt someone slide into the seat on the other side of me and I turned expecting to see Joe. It was Mick Barnes. "What are you doing here?" I asked in surprise. "You should be in jail."

"He's here legally, my dear," Niko said. "Mick is waiting for trial and I posted bail for him. I used your cousin, Vinnie. I'm surprised you didn't know."

"I only know about the FTAs," I said. I looked out through the darkness and saw silhouetted figures. Where was Joe? The little hairs on the back of my neck were prickling. Something was wrong, but I wasn't sure what.

"Mick is here at my request," Niko said. "There was an easier way to do this, but I'm afraid you've made it necessary to take a more—shall we say—sinister approach. Mick will be taking you to my home where you'll be staying for a few days as a guest. You see, I need to speak to Carlos urgently, and he's been hard to find. I think if he hears you are spending some time in my company he will be forthcoming."

"You can't kidnap me!" I said. "We are in the middle of a wedding reception!"

"Oh, but I can," Nick said. He nodded his head toward Mick and then walked away. I tried to stand, but Mick's big meaty hand pulled me close against him. I saw his other hand coming toward my face. He had a cloth in it and I wasn't sure whether he was going to drug me or gag me. Either way, I knew I had to scream and scream quick. I drew in a breath and then held it as I heard the click of a safety.

"Let her go," Morelli said.

"Joe!" I exclaimed, relived he'd figured out what was going on. He stood larger than life, and I felt safe again as I saw the weapon in his hand, pointing straight at Mick. I couldn't believe they were attempting a kidnapping right in the middle of a wedding reception. The fireworks were a perfect cover, because other guests weren't taking notice.

Mick Barnes didn't let go. He ignored Joe and tightened his hold on my arm. I sat frozen, not even attempting to get away, mostly because I didn't believe what was happening. Another man materialized out of the dark night and stood next to Joe. I saw Joe stiffen and realized the man had a gun to Joe's back. A third man came and stood behind me.

"Check and mate," the man behind Joe said. Mick stood and, still holding on to me, began to pull me up and out of my chair.

"Don't be stupid," Joe told him. "You won't get away with her."

"You gonna stop him?" the other gunman asked. "Not likely."

"More likely than you know," Joe responded. He swung around and grabbed the arm of the man behind him. The sky suddenly lit with another round of flashes, and the resounding booms caused a chorus of "oohs" and "aahs" to emanate from the guests.

I saw Joe crumple and fall. The gun had been fired with precision timing to the last flash-boom, and no one even turned in our direction. I looked down and saw a huge blossom of blood growing on the front of Joe's white shirt. I heard screaming. It wasn't until much later that I discovered it had been coming from me.

I remember hearing Mick's harsh words to the shooter. It was apparent that shooting a Trenton cop wasn't part of the plan, because suddenly I was alone standing over Joe. The henchmen had disappeared into the night, because once I started screaming, I seemed to be incapable of quitting. I was now drawing attention. A lot of it.

I left the table and slid to the ground where Joe lay. His eyes were shut and his body was motionless. This was serious. I didn't know what to do. Did I put my hand on the wound to stop the bleeding? Did I leave Joe, because it looked as though he was as good as dead, and chase after the men who had somehow disappeared? Or did I just pass out? The last option seemed the most likely. But then Tank was there pulling me up and away from Joe.

There were more RangeMan operatives than I had known at the wedding and they converged on the area where Joe had fallen. Tank shook me and I'd like to say it was to prevent me from becoming more hysterical, but it was probably because he was angry at my unprofessional behavior.

"What happened?" he asked.

"Niko," I said.

"Niko shot Morelli?" Tank asked, sounding astonished.

"No. Mick Barnes, no not Mick, but someone with him shot Joe. Oh, God, please! Don't let him die." I tried to turn back to Joe, but Tank was holding tight. Far more tightly in fact than Mick Barnes had been holding me.

"We've got this under control," Tank said. "911 has been called. I need to get you out of here. Come on!"

"No," I wailed. "I need to help Joe." I pulled against Tank. He responded by picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder. As he moved quickly through the crowd with my ass pointing skyward and my head bouncing against his back, a kaleidoscope of blurred images passed before me. The last thing I remembered was a bride and groom looking truly horrified. That would teach them to accept anything from Niko Mattas, I thought. I next thought I might be sick, and then, blessedly, I didn't think any more at all, because I must have passed out.

Later, as I was sitting in the RangeMan fleet vehicle drinking a can of Coke Tank had forced on me, I tried to recall in detail the order in which things had actually happened. I couldn't do it. I looked through the window where Tank was standing by the hood of the car, talking on what I thought might be a SAT phone. His body was still, and it was dark on the side of the road so I couldn't see him well, but I heard the low rumble of his voice. I couldn't make out the words, and I was pretty sure that's why he was standing at the hood of the SUV. He didn't want me to hear.

When he got back into the car I wasted no time. "Why are we stopped here?" I asked. "I need to get to the hospital. Joe looked bad. I need to be there with him."

"Do you have a valid passport?" Tank asked.

"Tank!" I exclaimed. "Listen to me. I need to go see Joe."

"Morelli is at the hospital, and is already in surgery. There's no need for you to be there."

"There is," I insisted. "He saved my life."

"You can't go to the hospital," he said flatly. "I need to get your passport. Where is it?"

"In a safe place." I reached for the door handle. "I'm going to go to the hospital to see Joe, and if you won't take me, I'll walk." Before I could open the door the automatic locks clicked.

"Stephanie. Quit the bullshit!" Tank looked at me and I could see the anger in his eyes. And something else, maybe. I might have seen fear. And then I was overwhelmed with fear. Because Morelli getting shot, or me being kidnapped wouldn't cause Tank to be afraid. He was afraid for Ranger.

"Oh no!" I said. "What's happened. Do you know something about Ranger?"

His answer was telling, even if it wasn't to the question I'd asked.

"You can't help Morelli by going to the hospital. He's either going to make it through or he's going to die. I need to get to Columbia, soon. And after tonight and Niko's attempt to get to you, I need you to come with me."

"Okay," I said, my voice sounding small. "I keep my passport and important papers in my cookie jar, with my gun."

Derision. He looked at me with derision! My temper started to rise and that was a good thing, because my temper could get me through a lot ... and it looked as though there was going to be lots of stuff to get through.


	6. Chapter 6

AN mea culpa! Thanks to my patient, kind and wise beta jago-ji.

A holiday story so big, it had to be told in two parts

 **Co-Independence Day, Part 2**

 **Sleeping Together**

The rain was wind-driven and slammed into the side of the building. I could see flashes of lightening around the edges of the closed curtains. Good thing the storm had held off long enough that the skies had been clear for the after-wedding fireworks. I stood and looked at Ranger's bed for a long moment, but couldn't bring myself to pull back the covers and climb in. Tank had instructed me to get some sleep, and for once, I wanted to follow his orders, but I didn't think it was going to happen.

I shuddered as a particularly loud clap of thunder made me remember the sound of gunshots. My thoughts turned to Cathy and Tim. Months ago, their engagement had been ruined by the bride's untimely poisoning, and now their wedding reception had come to an abrupt end with the shooting of Joe. I hoped for their sake they would end their association with Niko Mattas. He seemed to be their unlucky charm.

It seemed like days since Joe had been shot, but it had only been hours. I'd been an automaton, allowing Tank to take me from the house at Deal straight to RangeMan. I knew Tank was busy fending off the Deal police. I hadn't talked to anyone, and bringing me to RangeMan was a good indication he was going to keep me from that. Were there other witnesses? I wondered. How could there not be? Joe was shot at a wedding reception!

Being in Ranger's apartment in his absence was usually comforting to me, but not tonight. Tonight I was traumatized at the memory of Joe collapsing at my feet. I was wrought with fear over Ranger's missed check-in, and I was frightened for my own safety. Niko had been planning to kidnap me. I did a whole body shiver at the thought of what might have happened, and then a massive wave of nausea overwhelmed me as I remembered what had happened.

I knew Tank was working behind the scenes getting ready for us to leave Trenton, but I was feeling very alone. And very imprisoned. I considered leaving to go check on Joe. RangeMan was secure, but I was betting I could get out. If I did that though, Tank would be furious. I didn't want that to happen. I needed to be in the loop and it looked as though I was going to be completely on the inside. Tank said we were going to Colombia. We were going to find Ranger. With that thought I turned back to the bed.

Before I could once again face the demon of crawling into the bed, I heard the apartment door open. There were subsequent footsteps crossing the foyer. I turned and left the bedroom wondering what news Tank had for me. But it wasn't Tank ... "Lula!"

"Trouble finds you, Stephanie Plum. That's one thing I know for sure."

"What are you doing here?" I asked. She was wearing a pink sweatsuit with the word "Foxy" written in sequins across her chest. Her hair was pink (a wig I suspected) and so were her sneakers. She looked like a slightly bedazzled bottle of Pepto Bismol, but she looked great to me. Without moving farther into the apartment, she held out her arms to me and I crossed the room and let myself be wrapped in her warm and comforting hug.

"Tank sent me," she said. "He said he was busy doing important stuff, and he didn't want to leave you alone. He's pretty shook up about Morelli getting shot. He said you were, too."

"I am."

"Sit down," she instructed me. "I need to hear the whole story. I knew there was something fishy about you and Officer Hottie. Tell me what's really going on."

I sat down and did as she said. It was cathartic to spill the story, because Lula would understand how torn up I was about Ranger not checking in. And she would understand how devastated I was when Joe got shot. And of course she would understand my less than noble feeling of fright for my own safety. Lula knew me well, and she had been with me from the beginning. She'd been in the bonds office the morning I'd come in after sleeping with Joe—way before Ranger had been on my radar. But she'd been there for that, too. It was a relief to tell her that Ranger had confessed his feelings for me.

When I finally stopped to catch my breath she settled herself on the sofa next to me and gave me another all-encompassing hug. "You need to take care of yourself, Stephanie. I talked to Tank before I came up here, and I didn't understand what was going on then, but he gave me some tasks to do, and I'm gonna do them. You have to do your part, too. First things first. You need a shower, girl."

I looked at her in surprise. It seemed such an out of place suggestion, until I let my eyes follow hers. I was still wearing the dress I'd worn to the wedding, and it was smeared with Joe's blood. The tears came at once. I tried to duck my head and cover my face with my hands, but Lula's hands came up and held mine.

"Go on," she said. "There's blood spots on your face and arms, too. You get stripped down and get in that shower. A shower is a nice private place to get yourself back in order. Hard to separate tears from shower spray."

I understood her meaning and with a sigh, I gave into what I'd been trying to avoid. I went into the bathroom, stripped, stepped under a hot stream and covered myself from head to toe with a thick lather of Bulgari. I was wrapping myself in Ranger as the traces of Joe's blood trickled down the drain. The symbolism was not lost on me, and I found Lula was right. It was hard to tell the difference between tears and the shower spray.

Later, wrapped in the terry robe I found on the back of the bathroom door, I rejoined Lula in the living room. I was sure Ranger had never worn the robe, even though, presumably, it was his. I thought maybe it was one of those "Ella" touches so prevalent in his apartment. It served my purposes well tonight. There was no way I could bring myself to put one of Ranger's t-shirts on. I didn't want to assume he was okay while I was hanging out in his place, because I didn't want to do anything that might jinx his safety. It was illogical, but it made sense to me. If it happened that I was able to find the courage to sleep single in Ranger's more than double bed, then I'd be sleeping in the robe.

"You look better," Lula said as I reclaimed my place on the sofa.

"I can't say I feel better," I told her.

"You need to calm down, Stephanie. Tank has everything under control. He said you're leaving tomorrow, and I am going to talk to your family and make sure they understand everything is okay."

"My family!" I'd been in such a state of shock I hadn't even stopped to consider the Burg grapevine. I'd unintentionally left my purse in the SUV when Tank had brought me to RangeMan earlier. That was a blessing, because I was sure there were at least a dozen messages waiting for me.

"I'm gonna visit them first thing in the morning, which ain't all that long from now, and explain that someone tried to kill Joe, and that you are going to a safe house until the situation clears up."

"No, I'm not." I said forcefully, wondering what Tank was up to. He'd said we were going to find Ranger.

"Of course you're not," Lula agreed. "Tank just said to give them that story. I'm the only one he told the truth to. He said you're leaving tomorrow and that no one should know. He only told me to gain my cooperation."

"I know we need to get away as soon as possible," I told her. "but it seems wrong to walk away from Joe. It was my fault that he got shot."

"I don't know about that," Lula said. "It seems to me that Morelli usually knows what he's doing, so if he got shot he must have known he was taking some kind of risk. It's not important now anyway. He's been in surgery and they got the bullet out. Tank told me right before I came up here that his family is all there at the hospital. I think that's a good reason for you to stay away. An' Tank said they have him under police protection. Those guys that shot him aren't going to get another chance at him. They done everything they can and Morelli is strong. He'll make it through. They got him in the gut, but at least his equipment is still all intact. That would have been a real shame."

I sat and listened to Lula's ramble and felt comforted by it. It had been thoughtful of Tank to call her, and thoughtful wasn't something I associated with Tank. At least not where I was concerned. I wondered if Lula knew about Jeanne Ellen and Tank. I shivered at the thought of Jeanne Ellen babysitting me, and I knew I'd remember to thank Tank for sending Lula.

"You go on to bed, Stephanie. I'll just stay out here. Then in a few hours, when Tasty Pastry opens, I'll get donuts and take them to your momma and your granny."

We both stood at the same time and I hugged her tightly before I turned to go in the bedroom.

"Thanks, Lula … for coming over here. I'm glad Tank thought to call you."

"Of course he called me. Who'd you think he'd call? That old snaggle-tooth, Jeanne Ellen?"

"I … uh, you know about Jeanne Ellen … and Tank?"

"Hmmph! Not much about Tank I don't know," Lula said. "What I know is, he is smart. Smart enough to know only Lula could handle this job. Can you see Jeanne Ellen sitting in your momma's kitchen eating Boston Crèmes with her and your granny? She'd probably be wearing her catwoman outfit. That's not Burg dressing."

I looked again at Lula's pink ensemble and, in spite of my anxiety and fatigue, I smiled. Lula grinned back. "I see you understand what I'm sayin'. Now go on ... get in that bed. You need your beauty sleep coz you don't wanna look like something Tank's cat dragged in when you see Ranger." I went to bed and I slept.

After thinking I wouldn't sleep at all, it came as a shock to wake up, shut off my phone alarm and realize someone had been in the room where I was sleeping without my awareness. My phone was sitting on top of my pocketbook, which was sitting on top of a stack of neatly folded clothes on the bedside table. I felt uneasy with the idea of Tank being in the room while I was sleeping, but after I took a longer look at the table, I came to the conclusion Ella had been my visitor.

The message was clear. I should get up, get dressed and prepare to face whatever the day had in store for me. I looked at the display on my phone and saw fourteen missed calls, most from my mother, but a couple from my sister, one from Connie, and an unknown number which I suspected might have come from the Deal police. Suddenly the thought of leaving the country, even with Tank, wasn't so scary.

It took me twenty minutes to get myself ready and head down to five. I walked into the control room and immediately the conversation stopped. "Nice, guys," I said. "Way to keep me from guessing you were talking about me."

"We weren't," Lester said matter-of-factly. "We were talking about Morelli. We shut up because we didn't think you needed to hear what we were saying."

My stomach dropped to my toes. "What about Joe? Is he … did he ...?"

"He's alive and he made it through the operation fine," Lester said. "He's not talking yet, cause he's all drugged up. We were speculating on if he would be able to ID the shooter."

"Maybe he can," I said, considering. I tried to remember the sequence of events. I thought possibly Joe had gotten a good look at the man who'd pulled the trigger.

"Can you identify the shooter?" Lester asked.

"I can identify one of the guys with him," I said. "It was that asshole Mick Barnes."

"It doesn't matter whether you can identify the shooter," Tank said from behind me. "They can identify you and that's why you're coming to Colombia with me."

"We could put her in a safe house," Lester said. Tank frowned at him, but Lester continued. "We can keep her from harm, boss man. You don't have to haul her with you."

I don't know what upset me more. The idea that Tank was dragging me with him because he'd been given the task of babysitting me, or the way Lester casually referred to Tank as boss man. It was true that when Ranger was away, Tank was in charge, but Ranger was the boss. Did they all know something I didn't? I willed my knees not to buckle.

"You ready to go?" Tank asked.

"I think so. I found the suitcase Ella packed, and Lula said she'd tell my family. I need to get my passport if we're leaving the country." Tank handed me a small clutch. I opened it and then looked up in surprise at Tank.

"That's the only ID you can take," he said. "The phone is mostly for show. You can use it for navigation or to check the weather. No social media, no emails and no calls. That means you cannot call your family or call to check on Morelli. Is that clear?"

I was being reprimanded, and I hadn't done anything wrong. The group that had been talking when I came into the room had started to disperse at Tank's arrival, but they were all within earshot. I knew my response to Tank's command had to be controlled, but my heart was shouting, "You can't talk to me that way, you arrogant dickhead!"

I nodded and said in a smooth voice, "Of course I understand. Any inappropriate action on my part could potentially put either Joe or Ranger in more danger, and I would never do that."

I pulled the passport out of the clutch and immediately frowned. My passport was pristine, as it had never been used. I had obtained it optimistically a year earlier when Connie, Lula and I had planned to spend a long weekend in Bermuda. It had never happened. The passport I was now holding had signs of wear. I flipped it open to see my picture but the name was wrong. Stacy Plumeri. And Stacy had been places, lots of them.

"I can't use a fake passport," I said.

"It's not fake," he replied.

"But…"

"It will hold up to any amount of scrutiny." He pulled a similar passport from his pocket and flipped it open. Apparently I was traveling with Frank Black, and Frank had been even more places than Stacy. Tank sighed, probably at the look of disbelief on my face. "I'll explain everything on the way to the airport. We need to get going, so go get your suitcase from Ranger's apartment.

I was settled into the passenger seat of a RangeMan pickup and we were on the road to the airport when I turned toward Tank and said, "Talk." He rolled his eyes and although there wasn't much funny in my life, I smiled a little. He hated talking. I didn't know if he hated talking in general or just to me. I suspected the latter.

"Ranger is missing." His bald statement of the fact had my stomach churning.

"That doesn't mean he is in danger. It just means he missed a previously arranged check in with me. The fact that Mattas tried to kidnap you is actually a good sign, because that means he doesn't know where Ranger is."

"I don't understand," I said.

"You don't have to. You just have to know that the possibility, hell, the probability is that Mattas and La Muerte Blanca are in business together. And it will be real bad business."

"Ranger told me that."

"They've probably both tried to double cross one another—you know that whole honor among thieves thing. If Mattas can't find Ranger and now he can't find you, he will start to wonder if you're working with Ranger. If anyone looks for you they won't find you. Stacy Plumeri is close enough that if you get tripped up with your name, you can recover, convincingly … but don't get tripped up."

"What exactly is Ranger doing down there? How are we going to find him? Colombia is a big place."

"I thought Ranger told you what he was doing," Tank said.

"I know what his objective is," I told him. "I don't know exactly how he plans to achieve it."

Tank was silent for a moment as he concentrated on his driving. He was pulling onto the freeway and as we left Trenton behind for Newark, the enormity of what was happening hit me with a force like a physical blow. His next words didn't calm me any.

"If I knew all the details, I wouldn't tell you. I'm Ranger's safety net, because the people he's in bed with on this op won't help him if he gets in trouble. We're going to the area in Colombia where I know him to be. We will make ourselves available to him, and if he's there and needs help he'll find a way to come to us. If he can't come to us, then there is nothing we can do, but we'll know we tried. He was aware of the considerable risk before he went."

"Why would he do something so dangerous?" My question was rhetorical. I didn't expect an answer and certainly not the one I got.

Tank looked over at me with what could only be described as a scowl. "That's what I asked him. When we left Colombia after our last skirmish with La Muerte Blanca we both swore we'd never go back. And now he's back. And he knows how bad it will be if his involvement is discovered. So that's a good question. Why would he do it?"

He was clearly expecting an answer from me. I remembered the night before Ranger left. "I can't ignore my past any longer if I'm to have a future. And I want a future with you," he'd said. Everything became clear.

"You blame me!" I said, astonishment causing my voice to shrill. "You think Ranger is doing this for me!"

"I don't know why Ranger is doing it," he said bluntly. "He has a good business and a number of men depend on him for their livelihood. I've asked myself why he would put all that at risk. I don't know why."

But he did know why. At least he thought he did. I could hear it in his voice. "I never asked Ranger to do this," I said. I was trying hard to maintain control. I didn't think crying would help the situation. "When he told me he was going after Vera I asked him not to. He said he was the only man who could do the job, and he was going to get it done. You can't blame me for this. This is not my fault!"

"I've heard that before."

I doubled up my left fist and punched out sideways. I caught him unaware and hit him in the ribs. It hurt my hand but it was worth it. I heard the air whoosh out and he hit the brakes instinctively.

"What the…"

"Keep driving and listen to me, Buster! I've always wondered why you don't like me, and now I know. You're jealous of the influence I have over Ranger. I'm coming between you and him and your little bromance."

"Bromance!" He was yelling. "What Ranger and I have is not a fucking bromance. We've been through more shit than you could imagine. I'd give my life for him … and he for me. Several times it looked like it would come to that, but we made it through. We were on the safe side, and now he's gone back into a hell hole. And yes, I think he did it for you!"

Well, there is was. It was all out. It should be a great trip to Colombia. We were both silent. I was always uncomfortable around Tank, and I didn't see that changing anytime soon, but I had to try. As the airport exit sign came into view I turned in my seat.

"Tank, I'm sorry," I told him. "I don't want you to hate me. I don't have near the influence over Ranger that you think I have. I never asked him to do this. He's doing it because he feels he needs to. He said he had to do it if we were to have a future, but I'd walk away before I'd see him hurt."

"I don't hate you," he said wearily, "but I'd be lying if I said I didn't resent you at times. Ranger is the rule maker, but often I'm the enforcer. Everyone tows the line and follows orders. I have control over my men. Every time you enter the picture, the control goes out the window. I'll give you that it's, maybe, unintentional, but you make Ranger bend rules for you."

"That's unfair," I said. Later, maybe I would realize there was some truth in what Tank was saying, but at that moment I was stunned and hurt by what I was hearing. "Ranger has asked a lot from me. He asked me to reestablish a relationship, of sorts, with Joe. And I did it. I've done everything he asked regarding Niko. I've followed the rules completely … and things still went to hell."

Silence fell over the truck cab again. I couldn't hold back the tears any longer, but I tried to be discreet. I didn't want Tank throwing my emotionalism back in my face. What happened next changed everything for me.

Tank held out a fist toward me, without taking his eyes off the road. "You're right. You have done everything he asked, this time. The past is the past. Truce?" He waggled his fist and I found my hand, fisted, reaching across the cab to bump his.

"Truce," I said.

…..

It was our fourth day in Colombia. The first night had been spent in Cali, a large metropolitan area, the second night in Popayán, and the third night in La Plata. Each town was smaller than the last. The town we were in now was only a village with the inevitable church gracing one side of the town square. There was a hotel, a café and a tavern, and according to Tank we were at our destination.

It was amazing to me the ease with which Tank navigated in this very foreign country. We'd had no contact with Ranger, but Tank wasn't especially worried. Mostly we had been together, but twice he'd left me in the hotel room alone with strict instructions not to stray. I'd obeyed. The first time, in Cali, he'd come back with a weapon. A scary looking gun and lots of bullets. The second time he'd come back with a smile, and a set of car keys.

"What are you so happy about?" I asked him.

"I made contact with someone who's been a reliable informer for us in the past. I think I know where to find Ranger, and we have transportation. We won't have to depend on bus travel, and that's good because I don't fucking fit in the seats!" He was still smiling, and that was rare, so I smiled back. The truce thing seemed to be working, which was a relief, because I was trying hard to make it work.

Transportation turned out to be a rusted jeep, with one door—on the passenger's side, thankfully. We had made our way and now were deep into the countryside, far away from the coastal area where we'd landed.

The hotel accommodations had become less and less desirable in proportion to the size of the town. At first, I had balked at the idea of sharing a room with Tank, but as we traveled farther from the urban areas, I felt much safer with him close by. The hotel in Cali had been very modern and we'd shared a suite, with each of us having our own private space. Today we were waiting for our room at the Hotel Gran to be readied. Tank sat in the one of the two chairs in the lobby and I was in the other. There was a fan lazily turning which stirred only a slight breeze.

"This hotel doesn't look so grand to me," I said.

"It's the only place to stay in town," Tank told me. "I paid 32,000 pesos for the room, and I imagine we'll get what we paid for."

"32,000!" I exclaimed. "That's highway robbery!"

"That's about eleven dollars."

I considered that and began to dread what we might find when we were escorted upstairs. "How much longer?" I asked. "I'm hungry. Can we get some food before we go up? It's getting late."

"Not late by local standards," Tank said. "But we can eat. The clerk said there's a café that's decent." We walked the short distance to the café. It wasn't crowded but there were a couple of other tables of diners. They stared. I figured it was because we were American. This was far off the beaten tourist path. Once again I depended entirely on Tank to order. The server seemed friendly and the food was palatable, but far from what I was craving. I wanted to find Ranger and I wanted to end this. I was homesick, not only for Trenton, but for the life I knew and the life I hoped for.

When we left the café to make our way back to the hotel, the little hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. Kind of like they did right before a FTA capture turned really bad. I had such a strong feeling of unease that I halted my step in the middle of the road.

"What?" Tank asked.

I looked both ways up and down the mostly deserted street. There was no one close to us or no one even approaching us. "I don't know," I said. Others said I had spidey sense, but I mostly discounted it. Now though… "Something seems off," I told Tank.

He grabbed hold of my hand and began to walk. Pulling me with him. I sometimes had a second sense when Ranger was near. I'd admit to that, but that wasn't what I was feeling. I didn't know if I was sensing danger or just having a moment. What was almost as unsettling as my feeling was how seriously Tank was taking it.

We entered the hotel and after a few terse words with the clerk, Tank was handed a key. He nodded at the man and turned to me.

"We're on the second floor. I think it's a good time for an early night." An early night by local standards wasn't really so early for a girl from Trenton. I agreed with him. Tomorrow, when we were fresh, maybe we'd find Ranger. If not … that feeling of unease made me completely close my mind to the possibility that we wouldn't find him.

We climbed the stairs and found our room. Tank unlocked the door and pushed it open and we stood and stared for a moment. The Hotel Gran was _not_ living up to its name.

I made immediate use of the restroom. I washed my face and brushed my teeth. I probably could have stood a shower, but the rusty pipe extending from the wall, and the handles underneath had me thinking I could just wash up at the sink. Tank was right. He got what he paid for. When I came back into the room I saw Tank using his big booted foot to push the armchair away from the bed. I realized at once what he was doing.

"Tank, you can't sleep on this floor."

He ignored me and grabbed a pillow off the bed.

"Tank!" I shuddered at the thought of what might venture out of the cracks in the plaster to scuttle across the floor after the light was out. What I'd seen when the light was on was enough to give me a major case of the heebie jeebies.

I pulled back the thin coverlet to inspect the dingy sheets. "It's a big bed. There's no reason we can't share." I wasn't just being magnanimous. I'd feel more comfortable with another body in the bed next to me. If creepy crawlies invaded, it would be nice for them to have an option of two bodies to snack on. Tank's shoulders moved slightly. It wasn't exactly a shrug, but more of a grudging acquiescence.

When he nodded his head toward the bed I needed no second urging. I kicked off my shoes, but left my socks on. My jeans were next and I quickly folded them and draped them over the back of the wooden desk chair. I slid between the covers and pulled them up under my chin. I would sleep in my t-shirt, panties and bra, and I would have the security of Tank beside me.

"See," I said as I extended my arm to the other side of the bed. "There will be at least twelve inches between us."

"There's more than inches between us," Tank replied. "Ranger's between us."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked.

He snorted. It wasn't quite a grunt, and it wasn't a laugh. It was a sound that was uniquely Tank.

"What I mean is that you carry Ranger with you. I don't mind having Ranger in the bed with us, but I bet the cop didn't like it."

"You're wrong about Ranger. He sent me back to Joe," I said. "And when that happened I didn't carry him with me. There is a potential, a promise of sorts, but for right now, there is no 'me and Ranger'."

He snorted again.

"Could you be a little more explicit?" I asked, sarcastically.

"You and Ranger are the only two who don't know what's between you."

"So far, there is nothing defined between us," I said. "That will change if things go well here."

"So far," he said, repeating my words. "There's been plenty between you. Your head's pretty deep in the sand if you don't realize that. And so far, _things_ aren't going particularly well down here." He walked slowly across the room and flipped the wall switch. The darkness was instantaneous and complete, and I was reminded we were not in a metropolitan area.

I heard the soft sounds of his approach to the bed. There was a weariness to his step, and I wondered what this trip had taken out of him. Both he and Ranger had implied that Colombia was a place they'd be happy never to visit again, and yet here he was. He was doing a good job of keeping me safe, and I was filled with a surge of appreciation. I'd tell him, when we got back how much I appreciated what he was doing for me.

I heard the brush of fabric on fabric as he removed enough clothing to sleep comfortably. I didn't wonder too long about what exactly he'd taken off. Better not to know. The bedsprings creaked ominously as the mattress absorbed the bulk of him.

Several minutes passed with no sound from either of us. In the dark room the enormity of what was happening struck me with renewed anxiety, and I faced what I had been trying to avoid thinking about. Ranger was missing. Tank said that it wasn't unknown for Ranger to miss a communication deadline and it didn't necessarily mean he was in trouble, but I thought Tank said that for my benefit. I could tell he was worried. I was glad for the darkness, because although I'd tried to be brave, the travel and my fatigue were wearing me down, and the tears began to run down my cheeks. I would be brave in the morning, I promised myself, but tonight in the darkness of this one-star hotel room, I was silently giving into my despair that something horrible had happened to Ranger.

I hadn't made a sound, I was sure of it, but I felt the velvety and surprisingly soft touch of Tank's hand. His fingers searched for and found mine and he interlaced our fingers as he drew my hand to the middle of the space between us. Neither one of us spoke. There was really nothing to say. We were mostly strangers with only one thing in common. We both loved Ranger. Tank loved him like a brother, and I loved him like a…I loved him. And we both thought something bad had happened. Even if we couldn't verbalize it.

The comfort of Tank's touch eased my anxiety and I fell asleep. I came awake with a start and saw there was light in the room. Low level light, but still enough that I could see a man at the foot of the bed. I heard a metallic click and looked sideways to see Tank, his left hand still entwined with my right. He was sitting and in his right hand was a gun. I wasn't sure if the click was the safety being set or released, but it didn't matter because I heard his softly uttered, "Fuck," and saw his body relax.

And then the tingling at the back of my neck alerted me, and I took a good long look at the man at the foot of our bed. It was Ranger. He was dressed in an ill-fitting chambray shirt and dark trousers, and both he and his clothes were filthy. His hair was dull and hung around his face in greasy strands, and his scent filled the room. It was the scent of unwashed male, without a hint of Bulgari. His eyes were flat with no light in them at all and they were focused on Tank.

"What happened?" Tank asked him.

"It's going slower than I anticipated, but it's going well. I'm on the inside. I'll be done with Phase One in a few days and then I'll be able to come home. And when I get home I'm going to kill you."

"It's a big bed," I told Ranger. "We were just sleeping together, that's all."

He ignored me completely.

"You told me to keep her safe," Tank said.

"And you think the base camp of La Muerta Blanca is safe?"

"I think she's safe with me. Morelli's critically wounded, but still hanging on. Mattas tried for Stephanie and the cop got in the way. And Mattas is still on the hunt for her since he can't locate you. I didn't think you'd want her alone in Trenton with him."

"I'm being watched closely," Ranger said, "but everyone is watched closely down here. They're on board with me. I took a risk to get here, because I couldn't believe what I'd heard. That you brought her here."

"You put me in charge, man," Tank said. "I'm handling it. She's safe."

"No one is safe here," Ranger said. "You've created interest in this town. That's how I found you. You need to leave soon, tomorrow if possible."

"Will do," Tank said. "You coming with us?"

"I can't leave yet. I told you. Soon though. I couldn't get away to check in, but that situation has been … eliminated. I'm tying up loose ends. I'll be home soon."

"She can go back to a safe house," Tank said. "I can get her out, and then I can stay."

Ranger shook his head. "Not necessary. The locals are talking about the gran hombre negro con una mujer blanca. They think that you're lovers on the run. You should act like it."

"That won't be hard. We're already sleeping together."

"You're a dead man."

Tank's low rumbling laugh caused me to turn from Ranger and look at him, and when I did the room went dark. I heard one small creak which I realized was the door closing. Ranger was gone.

I was stunned. "He didn't look at me," I said.

"He couldn't," Tank replied. "He couldn't look at you and maintain the role he's playing. He'd lose his focus and losing his focus could cost him his life. Don't worry, little girl. I imagine he'll do plenty of looking when he gets home to Trenton."

Tank went back to sleep. I could tell from his slow deep breathing. It seemed as though the visit from Ranger had calmed him. It had done the opposite for me. I was in turmoil. Seeing Ranger in that state was upsetting to say the least. He'd completely ignored me. He'd acknowledged me only in conversation. And he'd looked scary. Not that I was afraid of him. It was more that I was afraid of what or who had changed Ranger's appearance so drastically. Tank said they'd been through more than I could imagine. Seeing Ranger brought that fact solidly home. I could never have imagined Ranger looking like he had tonight.

It seemed like hours, but eventually I fell asleep, only to come awake with a start. I could feel him. Ranger was back. I looked and saw the hazy outline of someone sitting in the armchair. It was a scenario I was familiar with, in a different setting.

He stood and walked to the edge of the bed. He reached out his hand to me and I sat up to take it. I knew, on some level, Tank was probably aware of what was going on, but it made no difference. Ranger was looking at me now. He was pulling me with him toward the door of the room.

The hallway was lit with a dim bulb hanging on a braided fabric cord from the ceiling. It gave me a clear look at Ranger. His beard was full and his hair was long. It hung in dirty hanks around his shoulders. His body was impossibly thin, and the needle tracks were still on his arms. Were they real, or was this still just a sham? I didn't know and hoped I never would. New lines were carved in his face. And he hadn't had a bath in quite a while. It made no difference to me. His stare wasn't blank. What I saw in his eyes was stark need, and it aroused in me a need to comfort, to heal.

He opened a door at the end of the hallway and pulled me through. The door closed behind us and we were in darkness.

"Babe."

One word softly uttered, reassured me this was the man I knew, despite his changed appearance. And then his lips were on mine and I quit thinking. This time Ranger wasn't a considerate lover. Ranger was a man assuaging a need that I knew went beyond physical. I had something I could give him. Tank said he couldn't lose his focus. I hoped that I was giving what he'd need to maintain his focus.

Later, when I thought back on it, it seemed almost like a dream. We didn't talk as we made love, or afterward when I lay in his arms. I fell asleep on a bed in a dark room with Ranger's arms around me.

I awoke in the bed I'd shared with Tank. He was standing at the bedside staring down at me. From the fierce look on his face, I wondered if the truce was over. At just the point where the silence was getting awkward, he spoke. "It's time for us to start the trip back home. Get up and get dressed."

…..

It felt good to be back in Trenton, if not in my apartment. I hadn't had to go to a safe house. Joe was recovering and he had been able to ID the shooter. Mick Barnes had been picked up and had, upon interrogation, sang like a church choir. His story confirmed Joe's ID, but the other men were still MIA. As was Niko. Although, remarkably, Niko wasn't wanted for anything other than questioning. His organization protected him well.

I was ensconced at RangeMan. Waiting. Every day seemed like an eternity. I wasn't exactly under house arrest, but it sometimes seemed like it. I had a RangeMan escort everywhere I went. It had been almost two weeks, and although Tank seemed unconcerned at Ranger's continued absence, I was starting to get worried again.

Cal, my escort of the day, had taken me to see Joe and then brought me back. I should have been forewarned by the funny little smile on Cal's face as he left me at the door to Ranger's apartment. I opened the door and the faintest whiff of Bulgari greeted me. I dropped my purse in the foyer and ran full tilt into the bedroom. Ranger, dressed in RangeMan black, freshly shaved and showered smiled at me and held open his arms. I launched myself into them.

And then to my complete surprise, and horror, I began to cry. Not sweet little tears. But horrible big hiccupping sobs. He held me while the storm passed and whispered comforting words in my ear.

"It's okay, Babe." "I told you I'd be back." "I'm home, just like I promised."

At the last words of comfort, I pulled away from him and looked up through swollen eyelids. "You're not!" I accused, half wailing, half whining. "You said you'd be back on Independence Day."

"I am," he said. "It's July 20th. Colombian Independence Day. Fitting, don't you think?" I didn't answer. His arms tightened around me and he spoke softly into my ear.

"My past is now behind us. It's over, Babe. It's completely over."

But, of course, it wasn't.


	7. Chapter 7

**_To quote Gene Autry, "I'm back in the saddle again." Thank you, jago ji for fixing all my mistakes._**

Love's Labor's Lost

The car was hot and steamy. My air-conditioner coolant needed a recharge, but since I'd been driving a RangeMan vehicle the last few weeks I had neglected to take care of my own car's maintenance. Neglected wasn't the right word, because it implied that I sometimes did take care of my car. I preferred the "drive it until it dies and then get another old junker" method of auto upkeep.

I'd recently become used to a higher standard of luxury though, because Ranger insisted I use a fleet vehicle for both my private and professional use. I didn't mind that, but I was getting tired of the Merry Man escort that came with the vehicle. I had nothing personal against any of the guys. In fact, I liked them. It was just that sometimes a girl has to do things that are better done without an audience, or at least without an audience that reported to Ranger.

When Ranger came home from Colombia, he said that it was over—that his past was behind him and we'd have our someday, but he hadn't quite been able to deliver on that promise. Eduardo Vera aka La Muerte Blanca was dead. That knot was tied nice and tight, but there were still some loose ends, and I could tell Ranger was worried.

A bead of sweat rolled down my chest and disappeared beneath my tank top into the cleft between my breasts. I idly swiped my hand across my chest and wondered what the heck was taking Lula so long? A crumpled envelope on the floor caught my eye. I grabbed it and gave it a cursory look, groaning as I realized it was an overdue notice for my water bill. I needed to remember to do something about that, but right at that moment I was using the envelope as a fan to stir up some breeze. Holy moly, she'd been in there fifteen minutes! I thought about getting out of the car and going into the store after her, but that would have defeated the entire purpose of telling her my business in the first place.

I was in the parking lot of the Walgreens in Hamilton Township. Far enough away that I hoped I wouldn't run into anyone from the Burg, but close enough that I wouldn't set off any alarms in the monitoring room at RangeMan. I had cajoled Ranger into letting me break free, a little. I told him that I needed some girl time and he'd reluctantly agreed to letting me spend the day with Lula, as long as I had my panic button and a full array of trackers. He'd made it clear since his return that I was to be extremely careful, and I'd been careful to do exactly what he'd asked. Niko Mattas was still MIA, and the Ramos family business he'd been in charge of was in chaos. Ranger had covered his tracks well so it wasn't generally known that he'd been instrumental in the death of Vera and the destruction of his Colombian hierarchy. I didn't know if he was directly responsible for Vera's death, and I didn't want to know. What I did know is that Ranger wouldn't rest easy until Mattas' whereabouts were known and he was dealt with. Ranger held a grudge, and his grudge against Niko was darn big!

Finally, I saw Lula exit the store and make a beeline for my car. She was carrying a bag that was suspiciously full. "What took so long?" I asked. "And what did you buy? It looks like you got more than I asked for."

"I got you just what you need," Lula said. She upended the bag and I watched as its contents spilled out onto her ample lap. "This first one here is an EPT test kit, and this other one is Clear Blue. I didn't know which was best so I got them both. The lady at the cosmetic counter said this was the best one though, so I got it, too." She handed me a bottle of Pine Sol.

"What?" I asked. "I don't need to clean my toilet. I just need to pee in it!"

"The Walgreens lady said you get a cup and pee in it and pour some Pine Sol on top, and if it changes color you're pregnant—100%." I rolled my eyes and watched as she stuffed the pregnancy tests back in the bag, along with the Pine Sol. "There's one more thing I bought," she said, grinning at me. "In case you get a craving!" It was a two-pound party pack of M&Ms.

"Are you having a craving?" I asked. One look at the bag made me think maybe I _was_ having a craving.

"Damn skippy! And ain't it fortunate that they don't melt in your hand. It's hot as Hades out today. You'd think by Labor Day summer would be over." She ripped open the bag and poured some into my outstretched hand as we left the parking lot.

I pulled the car to the curb in front of Lula's apartment and shoved the gear lever into park. "Lula," I began, not looking at her. "I … uh, thanks for helping me out today. I don't …" I was stuttering. I didn't want to offend her, but I wanted to explain how important it was that she should keep her mouth shut. She reached across and took my hand.

"Girlfriend, I get it. Anybody asks Lula, this whole day never happened. I don't know nothing." She grinned at me. "I really don't, an' neither do you, yet. If I hear some surprisin' news, I'll be real surprised!" She opened the door and had one foot on the pavement when she turned back. She picked up the M&Ms bag and poured a generous serving into her cupped hand, and then she got out and stood on the curb, watching as I drove away.

I took the stairs to my apartment, avoiding the elevator and possibly Mrs. Bestler. I didn't know if she worked holidays or not, but I didn't want to take the chance. I wanted to get in, do my business and get back to RangeMan. No doubt someone had noticed that I'd been to Lula's and would figure I was now operating solo—a big no-no until Niko Mattas was caught and dealt with.

I stood for a moment in the open doorway and looked at my living room. I was only in the apartment once or twice a week now, as I was spending most of my time at RangeMan. I crossed the room and threw the crumpled overdue notice on top of a stack of mail I needed to go through. Maybe it was time to make a decision about my apartment. And maybe what I was getting ready to do would help in that decision-making process.

I set the bottle of Pine Sol to one side and pulled out the EPT kit. As I read the instructions, I stuffed the kit under my arm and ambled to the bathroom. I was beyond nervous. I was downright scared. I hadn't had a period since before Tank and I had gone to Colombia, and that, combined with what I _had_ had—unprotected sex with Ranger, also in Colombia—made it likely that I was pregnant. And while I needed to know, that thought of knowing was making me move forward in slow motion.

I was wearing a wristwatch so I could time the test accurately. I unzipped my jeans and lowered myself onto the toilet seat and—nothing. I couldn't go. I'd downed two bottles of water while I'd been with Lula, but the day was so hot and humid, I must have sweated it all out. My bladder was empty. I stood and pulled my jeans back up, leaving them unsnapped. I needed more to drink.

The kitchen counter was empty. The absence of Rex made the apartment seem a little abandoned. Rex was living with Ranger now. I hadn't spent a night here since Tank had brought me back to RangeMan. Every so often I'd stop in and collect my mail, and pick up whatever necessities I needed. I pulled a glass from the cupboard and held it under the tap, turned the faucet and waited. No water. The late notice came immediately to mind. I'd let it go too long and now my water was shut off. I would take care of it first thing in the morning, but for now, I needed a drink.

The fridge contained a carton of milk that was so outdated, the contents were more solid than liquid. I reached for a solitary can of beer, the only other liquid in my fridge, and then paused when my hand was halfway there. If I was pregnant, I shouldn't be drinking beer. Shit!

I'd just have to wait it out. My bladder would fill eventually. I went to my dining room table and sorted through the accumulated mail. No other late notices, just junk mail I'd glanced at quickly before I'd tossed it there. I really needed to make a decision about the apartment.

I'd thought my future would be lined out before me by this time. Ranger and I should have defined our happily ever after and be well on our way to it. What he'd shown me of a life together so far was not as I'd imagined. Oh sure, I was living at RangeMan, sleeping next to Ranger every night and oftentimes waking up deliciously tangled with him. But he hadn't made love to me. Not one time. That made my present situation a little ironic.

I had a lot to think about. I went to my bedroom and collapsed on my bed, adopting my thinking position, but this time I didn't nap. I thought. I thought back to the day Ranger had come home from Colombia and taken me in his arms. "My past is now behind us. It's over, Babe. It's completely over," he'd said. But it wasn't. His past was living with us.

 _The Ranger who had his arms wrapped around me was the Ranger I remembered, not the dirty unshaven Ranger from Colombia. I turned my face up for his kiss and he kissed me long and hard, like I was water and he was thirsty. My arms came around him and began to caress his back. I felt the unusual thinness and tightened my grip. Thank God he was home._

 _And then he pulled back and broke the embrace. "Babe, I … can't. We can't."_

" _Can't?" I'd asked._

" _We can't make love. At least, not for a time. There's a medical issue."_

" _Oh no!" I exclaimed. My eyes slid directly to his crotch, imagining things I still couldn't bear to think about._

 _Ranger smiled wryly. "It's not that. I still have all my parts and they work. I can't be with you until I'm tested. For HIV."_

" _HIV!" I heard the shock in my voice. "You had unprotected sex with someone? I mean someone else, besides me?" The thought of Ranger having sex with some faceless person in Colombia shocked me. I was so distracted by the thought that I didn't immediately note the change in Ranger. When I did notice, my heart dropped to my toes._

 _For a moment, he looked truly puzzled trying to make sense out of my question. And then I saw the realization dawn on his face. He hadn't known. It hadn't even crossed his mind that we'd made love without protection that night in that dark room at the Hotel Gran. His need had been so great, and his focus so intertwined with his undercover persona that he hadn't known._

 _"¡Dios Mío!" It was a prayer as much as an exclamation. I saw the look of extreme concern cross his face and then with typical Ranger discipline, the shutters came down and he was once again in complete control._

" _I haven't been with another woman. It was a needle. A shared needle."_

 _That statement shattered my thought process and for a moment I was speechless. There hadn't been a woman. A shared needle, he'd said. Mr. Control had given up control in a hostile environment. He'd used IV drugs, in the company of someone else. And that probably meant he hadn't injected the irritating, but harmless substance Bobby had prepared for him._

 _His hands went to his hair and he ran his fingers through it, pushing it back from his face. Maybe he wasn't as completely in control as I had thought, because there was something showing in his expression that I hadn't seen before. I thought maybe it was fear._

" _You'll have to be tested, too."_

 _I pulled from his embrace and reached for his arms which were exposed beneath the short sleeves of his black RangeMan t-shirt. I saw no fresh needle tracks, but faint scars from healed ones._

" _I'm not an addict, Babe." There was impatience in his voice and I took umbrage with it._

" _You tell me you shared a needle, and I'm not allowed to wonder what you were injecting?" I asked. "I know it wasn't Bobby's harmless solution."_

 _He sighed heavily. "No. But it was just the one time, and I had no other option. I'd hoped to avoid the situation, although I went in knowing it was a possibility."_

" _You went on this mission knowing you might return home a drug addict?" I asked. My voice was controlled, but on the inside, I was seething. How dare he take that risk._

" _I'm not an addict," he repeated, "but there may have been other consequences. I hadn't anticipated that you'd be dealing with the consequences as well." His eyes were flat, his expression bleak, and for a moment I saw a glimpse of the anguished man who had made love to me in Colombia._

" _I was thrust into the situation on my first night at the encampment," he continued. "My cover wasn't well established. To have refused would have been to sign my death warrant."_

" _To do it may have signed your death warrant!" I exclaimed._

" _There is a difference between behavior that would get me killed and behavior with a risk," Ranger said. "If I'd been killed the mission would have died, too. It was just the one time."_

 _Screw the mission, I thought. My brain was jumping on a trampoline with my thoughts bouncing from place to place so quickly I couldn't talk. I might be HIV positive. Oh God! Ranger might be HIV positive. What horrible things had he endured in an effort to make it possible for us to have a future? I felt horrible for the pain and agony he'd put himself through to give me a shot at a happy life. And I felt terrible for my initial recrimination of his actions. He came home to me in trouble and I reacted like a thoughtless bitch. Tears were streaming down my face as I looked up at him, and that was bad. Because Ranger misinterpreted the cause._

" _I'm sorry, Babe. I'm so sorry I placed you in this position." He turned from me to stare at the wall. It was a simple move of physical withdrawal, but I knew at once it was much more than that, because before he'd turned away I'd seen something foreign in his eyes. It was a look of hopelessness and defeat._

" _Stop it!" I screamed. "Stop now! Stop blaming yourself." I went to him and jerked hard until he once again turned to face me. "It won't be HIV or Eduardo Vera or Niko Mattas who robs us of our future. It will be you, unless you quit thinking you've done something wrong. I'm not crying for me. I'm crying for you—for what I put you through! I'm the one to blame!" I collapsed on the floor and lay there in an ungainly heap, sobbing. I felt arms coming around me and I was lifted from the floor. He took me to his bed where we lay holding one another for hours._

 _We never finished our conversation. I wanted to, but he wouldn't talk about it. We went to sleep early that night and when I awoke in the morning, I was in his bed alone. He'd gone to be tested._

 _When he returned to the apartment mid-morning he came to me and pulled me into his arms for a long embrace. His lips caressed the curls over my ear and although it was the softest of whispers, I heard it clearly. "Negative. The HIV test was negative, but I was also tested for hepatitis. It will be a few days before I get those results."_

I hadn't gone for testing. Ranger said there was no need to. What'd he meant was there was no need to, yet. While his results were good, they weren't conclusive. He'd need to have both tests repeated three months out from the incident. If those results were negative, we could relax and begin to move forward. But three months was a long time.

The ringing of my phone brought me back to the present. I got up from the bed and went to pull my phone from my purse where I'd left it on the table. It was Ranger.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "You've been at your apartment for some time."

"I'm okay," I said. "I dropped Lula off and came by here to take care of some personal business. Are you still on monitor duty?" He always worked for his men on holidays so they could have time with their families, and he'd been on duty more than off this Labor Day weekend.

"Yeah, until six, then I'm done. I'm gonna raise the pay for monitor duty. It's harder work than you'd think. Tank is on his way over. I figured you were alone after I saw you'd stopped at Lula's. You shouldn't be alone."

"I'm fine," I said. "I'm locked in here and no one has made a move on me in all the time you've been back. I don't think I'm in any danger, but I'm being careful. I can drive back to RangeMan by myself."

"Too late, Tank's enroute. Ella's fixing dinner for us tonight. I thought we'd spend a quiet night in."

"Uh … sure," I said. We spent most nights "in." But I thought there was something in his voice. Something was different. Before I could think more there was a knock at the door. Tank, presumably. The Clear Blue pregnancy test, still sitting on the table, caught my eye. I went to the door and looked through the peephole.

"Hi, Tank. I'm not decent. You'll have to wait a bit. Don't break down my door or anything. I'm okay."

"I've seen you indecent, before. Let me in."

"Let you in or what?" I called back. "You'll huff and puff and blow my door down?"

"It could happen." The banter between us was new. It had been happening ever since Colombia, and I cherished it. Especially since I was pretty sure he knew about Ranger and the drug use. That meant he also knew about Ranger's concerns for me. I was betting he didn't know Ranger had refused all my attempts at intimacy. I'd researched safe sex, but Ranger's definition of safe was complete abstinence.

The sound of Tank's fist on my door spurred me into motion. I hurried into the bathroom and mentally assessed the situation. I still had no urge to pee. And even if I could do the deed, I couldn't do a pregnancy test with Tank waiting outside my door. I grabbed the test kit and took it to the table where the other kit was. I stuffed both into the deep recesses of my messenger bag. I took the Pine Sol to the kitchen and stored it in the cupboard under the kitchen sink. And lastly, I grabbed the bag of M&Ms and headed out the door.

"We need to make a quick stop on the way back to RangeMan," Tank told me. "We're working short this holiday weekend and I need to check on the Hanford building. There's a camera off-line."

"Okay. Was the camera vandalized?"

"Yeah, but not by human hands. There's a squirrel problem in the neighborhood."

In spite of my inner turmoil I laughed at the thought of Tank dealing with squirrels and security cameras. He understood my laugh.

"Normally this job would go to someone a little lower on the seniority chain," he said, "but Huey is home eatin' his momma's apple pie this weekend."

"So Huey gets the grunt jobs?" I asked.

"Sometimes."

"What about last St. Patrick's Day? Was watching me a grunt job?"

"Watching you is a job the men draw straws for. The short straw loses and has to take the assignment."

"Hey!" My feelings were getting ready to be hurt.

"Nothing personal," Tank said. "The guys love you. It's just that if they are on Stephanie duty and they screw up, they answer to Ranger. Watching you is a dangerous job."

"Hmmph! Well, aren't you worried to have me in your truck right now?"

"No," he said, throwing me a grin that was almost Ranger-worthy in its brightness. "I live for danger. I'm not afraid of you … and I'm not afraid of Ranger."

"What about squirrels?" I asked. "Are you afraid of squirrels?"

He harrumphed. We were silent for a while after that. I was thinking about what he'd said. It was true. He wasn't afraid of Ranger. He was number two at RangeMan, at least on paper, but in truth there was an equality between the men. Ranger couldn't do what he did without Tank, and Tank was always there for him. I considered telling Tank what I'd been doing that day. He, more than anyone else, would understand all the ramifications and I desperately needed someone to talk to.

Ranger and I were weathering this waiting period together. There had been nothing physical between us except some kissing and embracing, we were avoiding the big event. But things were good. We'd talked more in the last few weeks than in all the time we had previously known one another.

We learned a few days after the testing that the initial hepatitis screen was negative. Ranger's doctor was being conservative and both tests would have to be repeated in three months. We were sharing a horrible secret with the optimism that his second set of tests would show, definitively, he was uninfected. Now I was going to have to share the news with him that I was pregnant. The sense of optimism would disappear, and we'd be praying that neither he nor I was HIV or hepatitis positive. It was going to be one rough day after another until we found out for sure. My dipstick urine test was going to blow our complacent little world apart.

No matter how close Tank and Ranger were, I knew to tell Tank would be unfair to Ranger, so I sucked in a deep breath, found the M&Ms bag and offered him a handful before he left the truck to check on the camera.

When I walked into the apartment I could tell immediately that Ella had been there. The table was set for two with candles ready to be lit and a posy of beautiful fresh flowers providing an elegant, but simple centerpiece. I sniffed but there was no tantalizing aroma, so apparently she was going to be making another trip. It looked like we were celebrating something, and my heart fluttered a little at the thought. If I shared the news with Ranger, I doubted he'd think it was worth celebrating. He'd been working all weekend, covering shifts for men who were off, so maybe we were just going to wind up the Labor Day holiday with some quality food.

I went into the bedroom and dropped the M&Ms bag on the bed. It was considerably lighter than it had been when I dropped Lula off. I reached into my handbag and pulled out the already opened pregnancy test and stared at it. Finally, I had to pee, but no way could I do the test now. I'd made it this far, I'd have to tell Ranger before I made my pregnancy official. I exchanged the pregnancy test for the bag of M&Ms. My hand was on its way to my mouth when Ranger's voice stopped me.

"You don't want to spoil your appetite, Babe. Ella is preparing something special for us."

I twirled around to face him and I knew I looked guilty. He probably thought it was because I was caught in the act of inhaling a handful of candy. I thought it was because I'd moved slightly so my body was hiding the pregnancy test on the bed behind me. He took a step toward me so I took one toward him. I held my hand out and to my surprise he plucked a few M&Ms from my palm and ate them.

"What's wrong, Babe?"

"Nothing," I assured him quickly. "It looks like Ella has gone to some trouble to set the table as she did. What's the occasion?"

"It's a holiday," he said. "That and there are some things I'd like to discuss with you and I thought a shared meal would be a nice way to do it."

"That's great," I said. "Because I've got something to discuss with you as well." I swallowed the lump in my throat. I was afraid to tell him, because I was afraid the news would send him into an emotional tailspin. He'd accept blame for his role in the pregnancy. It was his nature to be a responsible person. But this was one thing we needed to discuss without blame. There was no easy way to tell him so I just took in a deep breath, blew it out and said, "I think I'm pregnant."

I saw his eyes widen slightly. "It's from the time in Colombia," I said. "I haven't had a period since before then, and I'm never late." I turned to his bed and picked up the test. "I had Lula get this for me today." I raised my hand so he could see the kit. His frown had me speaking quickly before he could say anything.

"Lula won't tell. I am so confined here … and before you say anything, that's not a complaint. It's just that I needed to get away and do this on my own and Lula was the only way I could accomplish it!"

"We could have done it together," he said softly. It was the softness of his voice that alerted me. He was hurt that I hadn't come to him. The tears that sprang to my eyes immediately were as good as a positive result from the EPT that I was pregnant. When had I ever been so emotional?

"We couldn't do it together," I replied. "You know the situation. You know that we're in limbo, waiting on the time for you to get tested again. I have to know for certain that I'm pregnant, and I know what that knowledge will do to you!" I had a suspicion that my mascara was making tracks down my face, but it didn't deter Ranger. He came forward and wrapped his arms around me. We stood in a close embrace that was comforting and empowering to me. I pushed back and he let me go. I turned and picked up the test and started toward the bathroom.

"Babe, wait."

I turned to find him close behind me. "I was retested. Friday was three months to the day of—the incident. I thought I'd have to wait until Tuesday for results, but Bobby has a friend at the lab. I'm negative for HIV and hepatitis."

I made some sound while I was trying to formulate words. I hadn't realized how far deep I'd pushed the worry until I'd heard the news we no longer needed to worry. "Oh! The dinner! You were planning a celebration to tell me we're in the clear!"

"It is a celebration," Ranger confirmed. He smiled at me in such a sweet way. "I didn't know at the time just how much we'd be celebrating."

Once again, he wrapped his arms around me. I buried my face in his shoulder, mindful of the mascara mess I must be, but hey, his shirt was black. It was all good. Time stood still with both of us drawing comfort from the closeness until his phone dinged. He pulled back to look at the display.

"It's Ella. She's outside with the meal and she's planning on serving us. Can you wait until after our meal to do the test?"

I nodded. "I was going to do it at my apartment, but I couldn't pee and I didn't have any water to drink so I just waited. I didn't want to do it alone, but I thought it would be better if you didn't know. I thought you'd be upset and …"

"…and you were trying in your own way to protect me?" Again, I nodded. His hand lifted my chin until our eyes met. "This is something we will do together, and we'll do it tonight. It seems we have a lot to discuss tonight, but for now, let's let Ella serve us."

"Go let Ella in," I said. "I need to fix my face."

"You do," he agreed. The kiss that followed his affirmation was tender. I would have stayed for another, but his hand pushed me toward the bathroom.

By the time I had made what were very necessary repairs to my face and rejoined Ranger, Ella had the food plated. She was getting ready to fill my glass with wine when I told her. "None for me, Ella. I'll just have water." I saw Ranger's eyes widen slightly at the realization of what I was really saying. I thought maybe he hadn't fully processed my news but that was understandable with the news he'd given me fresh on his mind. We were going to have a long night, with hopefully more than conversation. We'd talked deeply in the days after he'd returned from Colombia, and I was ready for a little less talk and a lot more action.

After Ella left us alone, Ranger sampled his wine and then said, almost casually, "We've located Niko."

"What! Where is he?" I asked. "and who is 'we'?" I was surprised at the news, but it suddenly made sense why Ranger had given in so easily to my request to spend the day with Lula.

"Arturo Ramos located his cousin."

I groaned. "Another Ramos?"

"The most interesting Ramos of all," Ranger said. "Arturo is a bright up-and-comer with an MBA from Harvard. He was brought in by the remaining members of the Ramos family to oust Niko. Niko pretty much ousted himself though."

Maybe it was because I didn't really want to think about being pregnant, or maybe it was because Ella's food was delicious, and I was hungry, but I found myself relaxing and listening to Ranger while I ate. It was an interesting story.

"Arturo was brought in to manage the legitimate side of the business. The old remaining Ramos clan is getting nervous about the longevity of their arms business. While that business is waning, the legitimate import/export business is making them a good living. Niko was supposed to be running it, but he got greedy, much like Homer before him. He wanted to bring drugs into the mix and that's where La Muerte Blanca came into the picture.

"La Muerte Blanca is dead, thanks to you," I said.

"There were a few people involved in his demise," Ranger said. "But it was more than him. They've decimated his entire Colombian infrastructure. The connection between Vera and the Ramos family is dead as well, and that's a very good thing."

"Where's Niko?" I asked again.

"In Greece. You know Alexander was half-Greek?" I nodded. "After he died the family needed to bring in some new blood. They brought in Niko and that was a mistake. He went into places he had no business going. The majority of the Ramos family didn't want anything to do with the drug trade. They learned their lesson from Homer. They had no idea the guy they were putting in charge was more power hungry than Homer had ever dreamed of being."

"How'd you get involved? Didn't you see Niko for what he was?"

"Not in the beginning," Ranger said. "I wanted to get to know him and I …" Ranger stopped talking for a moment, and I understood why.

"And you wanted Elaina," I said. He didn't respond. "Men!" I continued. "You developed a relationship with Niko so you could get to Elaina!"

"I did not." He took a long drink of wine and looked at me thoughtfully before he continued.

"I developed a relationship with Niko, because it was beneficial to me and to RangeMan to do so. Elaina made my acquaintance because of Niko's and my burgeoning friendship. At the time you were very involved with Morelli. You were making hints that you were finally going to marry him."

"So you had an affair with Elaina?"

"You were never the only woman in my life, Babe. Just as I was never the only man in your life."

I looked at my plate. This dinner was starting to give me indigestion.

"That, however, was then. This is now. You are the only one. You will be the only one as long as I draw breath." His words were uttered so casually that it took a moment for their content to sink in. When I met his gaze, there was nothing casual in the way his dark eyes held mine. Electricity shot through me.

"I'm going to finish this and then we won't speak of it again, because it's done. I did a favor for Niko. I identified La Muerte Blanca for him at Radius. I knew there was probably more to the story than he said, but my job was simple. ID the guy and tell Niko that he was the real deal. I wanted Niko in a position of indebtedness, and making the ID was a simple and easy way to make sure he owed me a big one. I had no idea of when or where I'd collect on the debt, but I wanted the association to be tilted in my favor, so I did it."

"It didn't turn out like you planned, did it?" I asked.

"It did not."

I thought about Niko being in Greece. "Does that mean I'm in the clear?" I asked. "He's not out to use me to get at you any longer?"

"He's not. Arturo asked for a meeting with me. He thanked me for what I had done."

My head came up at that. "How'd he know what you'd done?" I asked.

"It was a carefully planned 'slip' of information. We want Arturo to know that I was instrumental in breaking up the scheme Niko had. It will mean the Ramos family is still indebted to me."

"Why do we care about the Ramos family?" I asked. "I understand, in the beginning when you were trying to establish your street credits that you needed them for allies, but now RangeMan is wildly successful. Can't we just leave the Ramos family in the past?"

"I'd be more than happy if I never spoke to a Ramos again," Ranger said. "I can't burn that bridge until I …" he stopped talking, and stared at me with his liquid brown eyes. His hand reached across the table to lightly caress my forearm.

"Stop it!" I said. "You don't want to tell me the rest, and you're trying to distract me!"

He leaned farther across the table and let his finger slip up my arm and along the side of my neck. It was slow in coming, but I was exposed to the whole 200-watt smile. "How am I doing, Babe?"

"Not good enough. What aren't you telling me?"

Ranger sighed. "Like his sister Elaina, Niko sometimes acts irrationally, out of emotion rather than logic. He attacked one of the Ramos uncles in a fit of fury when he learned they brought Arturo in. That, on top of his ill-advised kidnapping attempt of you, sealed his fate. He lawyered up and was able to walk without any charges against him for Joe's shooting, but his family was very displeased. It was made clear to him, if he comes back to Trenton, he's a dead man … and he knows his family well enough to know they weren't kidding. He's persona non grata with the Trenton branch of the family. I'm almost positive we won't be dealing with him again. Keeping a relationship of sorts with the Ramos family is just a little added insurance."

"Does that mean I'm free?" I asked, my level of excitement rapidly rising.

Ranger frowned. "Are you asking if you can leave RangeMan?"

"I … uh …no!" I said, a little shocked he'd even ask. "I just mean can I move around more freely. Without the non-stop bodyguards?"

"Maybe. Probably. But you've got to stay aware, just on general principle. That's enough about Niko for one night, don't you think?"

Ranger pushed back his chair and came to pull me out of mine. "I'd planned to share all this news with you tonight. And then to tell you about the test results and let you know our nightmare was over. Your news gives us more cause for celebration."

I heard it in his voice and I chanced a glance up so see if I was right. I was. He was smiling at me. He was happy, I knew it but I wanted to hear it.

"Are you okay with a child?" I asked.

He nodded. "What about you?" he asked. "Are you okay with it?"

"I never thought I would be," I said. "But I figured this out a few days ago, and I haven't been thinking about anything else since. I think I'm okay with it. Knowing that you have a clean bill of health overwhelms me," I said. My eyes filled with tears that spilled down my face and I wiped them away with the back of my hand.

"Let's end this night with dessert," Ranger said.

"Okay, what did Ella make?"

"I don't know. I wasn't thinking about that kind of dessert." His hands cupped my head and guided my face close to his. His lips were gentle at first, almost tentative, but then he deepened the kiss. I responded. Ranger swung me into his arms and carried me into our bedroom.

My purse and pregnancy test were still on the bed, sitting right next to the bag of M&Ms. As he lowered me to the bed I put a hand against his chest. "I need to pee. I need to do the test."

"Not now, Babe," he said as he nuzzled my neck. "Go pee, and come to bed. We'll do the test in the morning. Tonight, I have other plans."

When I came back into the bedroom he'd moved my purse, the M&Ms and the pregnancy test to the dresser. The bed was looking empty and inviting. As I moved into his arms, his phone rang.

He looked at the caller ID and uttered something I was sure was a curse in Spanish. "I can't believe this," he said. "I've got to go. We're not fully staffed until tomorrow because of the holiday and I need to take this call."

"Is it squirrels?" I asked. "Tank said there were problems with squirrels."

"If it's squirrels, it's the two-legged kind," he said. "I'll be back as soon as I can, but I need to leave." He bent in and dropped a kiss on my lips, and left me alone in the bedroom with the pregnancy test … and the M&Ms.

Later, with my sweet tooth completely satiated I was on the verge of drifting off into a sugar coma. I thought about the day. I never could have imagined it would end in such a fashion. I wanted to slide under the covers and sleep until Ranger's return, but I had to pee. I looked at the pregnancy test but decided to wait until Ranger was with me. I grabbed the empty M&Ms bag and tossed it in the trash as I went from the bedroom into the bathroom.

When he found me, I was sitting on the floor of the shower. The water streamed down on me as I sat unmoving. He didn't hesitate and quickly peeled his clothes off. He stepped in and sat beside me on the wide floor. I wasn't crying. At least I didn't think I was. It was hard to tell with all the water and steam. I could see the question in his eyes.

I took a long deep breath and tried to sound completely in control.

"My period started."


End file.
